I have been wondering for the past week, have we gotten lost in the pages of The Onion, the online and print satiric newspaper, or maybe we’ve simply merged with the wood-pulp of The Sun or The Examiner…

“Daughter So Jealous of Mother’s Newest Baby, She Has One of Her Own”…

“Frontrunner with Middle Name of Hussein Tries to Claim Going to a Muslim School for Two Years Does Not Make Him A Muslim”…

“12, 000 Small American Flags Prepared for Transport from Invesco Field to DNC offices, are Stolen by Provocateur To Give GOP One More Useless Thing To Make a VERY IMPORTANT CENTRAL ISSUE”…

Meanwhile, in a huge clashing and sliding of econ tectonic plates, the Feds are Taking Over Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac. I have a report tomorrow as soon as I speak with the one finance/econ guy who is the smartest man I know about explaining such things to us, or at least me, the great unwashed.

Re the small flags from the DNC, and their thousands of signs as well, that blown backward and inside-out bumbershoot story amounts to this: I spoke to two persons at DNC downtown when I was in Denver today: 12,000 flags were wrapped along with thousands of signs for pickup. A worker called the Republican headquarters in Denver ‘to report’ the travesty that wasn’t. Some of the GOP people took the worker at his/her word that these were on the loading dock and therefore (in the worker’s mind) were being thrown away. They weren’t. They were waiting for transport. According to DNC cleanup coordinators, someone (said worker? no one knows) took quite a few of the flags from stadium without permission. Oh, and someone thought to take pictures of the flags wrapped for transport.

My husband USAF 21 years verifies what several of you have already offered… just to answer the questions swirling on Internet… to dispose of flags soiled, torn beyond repair, unless heirloom or commemoration flags carried during battle or other significant event, such as commemorative burial of a veteran, the proper conduct is to burn completely, and to bury the ashes. It is, in military, a ceremony. In private, it is asked that it simply be done with respect.

re Election 08 and its incessant urban-legend-like stories flying through the air like huge clots of muck looking for a wall to stick to… I don’t have a brick wall at hand, only a plaster one. And, maybe it is because life is particularly grim right now, but believe me… I am so so tempted to apply forehead to wall… except I am afraid I would lose more IQ points than I already have watching the flotsam and jetsam floating on the surface of the GOP DNC stories in media… while an Economic El Nino bears down with hard game.

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The Onion Man is from the streets of Seattle