When Did You Decide to Be Right-Handed? (‘Update’)
(See “Update” at bottom.)
Just when did you decide to be right-handed?
Since most of us are right-handed and use “[our] right hand O Lord glorious in power” perhaps a “fairer” question would be to ask those evil men and women who at one time or another decided to be contrary, “When and why did you choose to be left-handed?”
In a powerful piece in Newsweek, Kurt Eichenwald recounts how that “decision” — to use his left hand when he was a boy — led his grandfather’s teachers to slap his hand “whenever he wrote lefty.”
Being left-handed, they told him, was obviously a choice since the Bible made it clear that left was the side of Satan. The right hand of God was glorious in power, reads Exodus; God sends the blessed to his right and the damned to his left. So deciding to use his left hand meant my grandfather had aligned himself with Beelzebub, and needed to feel the pain of a loving God through the smack of a ruler. When that didn’t work, his left hand was tied down. As a result, my grandfather was forced to use his right hand, which our family believes led to neurological problems later in life.
If the question, “When did you decide to be a leftie?” sounds somewhat familiar and — more important — if it seems to lead to the better-known (sarcastic) question, “When did you decide to be gay?” the reader is correct.
As a matter of fact, in his must-read essay, Eichenwald immediately jumps into the heart of the issue, albeit sarcastically, at the very beginning:
Isn’t it awful how often gay people just flat-out lie?
Hundreds of thousands of them say they didn’t choose to be gay. Didn’t choose to risk being beaten by some passing yahoo. Didn’t choose to risk being cut off from their families. Didn’t choose to be in a society where strangers decide what rights they have, what jobs they can keep, where they can live, whether they can marry, whether they can adopt the children they raise or be at the bedside of a dying loved one.
What a bunch of frauds. In fact, why should anyone trust homosexuals to explain their personal realities when there are heterosexuals readily available to educate the world on the choice of being gay?
Eichenwald then muses on how a couple of GOP personalities — one a declared presidential candidate — would handle such “temptations.”
But then, “setting sarcasm aside,” Eichenwald proceeds to scientifically, biologically, medically, logically and even “biblically” destroy the ignorant, bigoted, hateful arguments that homosexuality is a choice or, for that matter, the once-held opinion by some that lefties are/were a biological aberration.
To the latter, Eichenwald has this to say:
We now look back at those times with pity. If only those teachers had known that left-handedness is almost always determined before birth. How would they feel confronting the fact that the God whom they thought hated the left had, by their own beliefs, created left-handedness? That they beat and bound children for being the way nature made them?
I hope that, one day, we will also look back with pity to these times when some still believe that “there is something wrong” with gay and lesbian people and to those who extend their prejudices to deny gays and lesbians the God-given right to love each other and to consummate that love with marriage.
Eichenwald also passionately points to same-sex marriage as an issue “that has generated some of history’s most ridiculous legal arguments by those fighting it.”
Remember that other “serious argument” against same-sex marriage and the aforementioned couple of GOP personalities?
Opponents who can’t argue religion in the courtroom claim that, once gay marriage is legal, people like Santorum and Carson — you know, straight guys — will abandon their families, become drug addicts, and stop doing hobbies.
If you don’t read anything else on this issue this year, please read Eichenwald’s “Blaming People for Being Gay is Like Blaming Them for Being Left-Handed.”
Finally, if the reader detects a certain intensity in my summary of this great article, it could be because there is a most wonderful man whom we love very much and who happens to be left-handed and gay. We call him “son.”
Lead image: www.shutterstock.com
And then there is this:
The Journal Star reports that “an Auburn woman calling herself an ambassador for God and his son, Jesus Christ, filed a federal lawsuit Friday against all homosexuals.”
In her seven-page letter she cites Bible passages that “describe homosexuality as an abomination and against nature, and she said never before has the nation or the state been ‘besiege(d) by sin.’”
Read more, should you doubt your eyes, here