Turds for Tesla

While announcing charges against three individuals accused of “violent destruction” of Tesla properties, Attorney General (sic) Pam Bondi said, “The days of committing crimes without consequence have ended.” No, they haven’t.

Donald Trump is currently taking bribes through his products, his crypto, and his stock. He’s violating the Constitution daily. And let’s not forget the pardon of 1,500 white nationalist terrorists who attacked the Capitol while committing an insurrection.

You can’t say that setting a Tesla on fire is an act of terrorism while attacking the Capitol is not. Can we start referring to the people in jail for setting charging stations on fire as “hostages?”

People are taking their anger with Elon out on Tesla. People are selling their Teslas and the stock is dropping. Elon has probably lost around $100 billion since the inauguration. I wouldn’t worry about it because the stock will rise again. At this moment, it’s at $278. While Tesla did take a huge drop, it’s still higher than stock in Apple, which is $220 at this moment, and Amazon is at $203. For giggles, Trump stock is at $21.

I’m kinda shocked Trump hasn’t cried out that not investing in Trump stock is illegal because that’s what he said about boycotting Teslas. As you know, people are taking their anger out on Tesla because of Elon’s attack on our government. Elon paid Trump to make him an unelected bureaucrat acting as the fourth branch of government. Elon was at another cabinet meeting today, this time at the big table. $277 million gets you a lot of access and gets the Attorney General defending your slimy racist ass. It got another Trump official to endorse investing in Tesla.

Several of my MAGA colleagues have drawn cartoons supporting Elon and accusing liberals and Democrats of no longer supporting EV cartoons, while not understanding that Tesla isn’t the only auto company selling EVs. Henry Payne has spent the past decade attacking EV cars but today, he’s suddenly defending them and is another MAGAt cartoonist not understanding that companies besides Elon’s sell EV cars. It’s especially weird because Henry lives in Detroit.

While I don’t want anyone hurt, it wasn’t a concern for Trump’s safety for why I was pissed someone shot at him. I didn’t want to give, no pun intended, ammunition to Republicans. I didn’t want Trump to become a martyr, and I didn’t want to hear Republicans claim Democrats are violent after they ignored that hate crimes increased under Trump.

In Horrible Bosses, One of the main characters is being yelled at by someone who also insults his car. He replied, “I don’t know why you’re mad at the car.” So I have to say to the Tesla vandals, I don’t know why you’re mad at the cars.

The thing is, you’re not going to hurt Elon. Elon is going to be OK no matter how much money he loses. Rich White a–holes bastards are always OK. Even when they’re broke, they’re not really broke. Even if he doesn’t reach his life goal of becoming a trillionaire (by stealing our money), he will still be OK. The only people you can hurt with this are the people who work for Tesla.

You have to be a seriously dumb to attack a car dealership with Molotov cocktails. One of these idiots burned down a charging station after writing anti-Trump graffiti on it. Nobody’s going to read your statement after you burn it down. Sheesh.

If you don’t want to help Elon and you purchase an EV from another company, more power to you. If you want to sell your Tesla, to avoid the shame and having to scrape doo-doo off your car, more power to you too. But, please don’t go around keying Teslas or throwing Molotov cocktails. Leave them alone. You can take comfort that the Cybertrucks are being recalled.

If nothing else, when you set a Tesla on fire or cover it with human feces, you’re not hurting Elon (you might be hurting the guy who has to clean the poop off his car). When you vandalize a Tesla, you’re helping Elon. People like Elon and Trump always play the persecuted victim, so please don’t help them.

Liberals, we need to hold the higher ground, not set it on fire.

Also, leave the sh– to the MAGAts. As we learned from J6, they’re the ones who aren’t housebroken.

Visit Clay Jones’ website and email him at [email protected].