As I walk into the Cancer Center for my daily treatments in West Harrison, I am immediately greeted by a large Welcome to Memorial Sloan Kettering sign. Then, I quickly encounter two more welcoming messages: “Kindness Matters,” and, underneath that, “This is a place for healing.”
At Memorial Sloan Kettering (MSK), I am discovering that these signs mean exactly what they say. As soon as I turn the corner to enter the inside door, there is an amazing man with “security guard” embroidered on his uniform and he so much more than that! This extraordinary man immediately greets patients, like me, and puts us at ease as we make our way to treatments. He also sets the scene for MSK as being a safe place. His name is Dumas, and his energy and manner are like a Master of Ceremonies. Many people who enter are regulars and come every day for specific periods of time. He makes a connection with everyone. He greets me with his chosen name for me––Sunshine. How could being called Sunshine not make a difference in my healing as I enter for my daily radiation treatment?
My experience of cancer treatment here has shown me just how much kindness and healing go together. I’m reminded of the ancient Greek Temple of Asclepius which represents the beginnings of modern medicine. The temple was dedicated to the god Asclepius who is known as the “father of medicine.” Over centuries, people journeyed from great distances to be healed at the temple. Just as many in need of healing travel long distances for treatment at Memorial Sloan Kettering.
It seems exceptional that MSK’s fundamental value––kindness–– intentionally permeates all aspects of the culture here. As I experience my daily treatments, I encounter kindness expressed in every aspect of the design and delivery of healing.
Once inside the main doors, there is an expanse that runs the length of the building. In fact, there are two floors, one above the other, designed in the same way. On the left side of the first floor, there are reception desks opening to hallways for blood work, the Café, rest rooms, exam rooms and the infusion area. On the right side there is a large waiting area with groupings of chairs and tables. The tables are available for anyone who needs to work on a computer, and there is also a long table for people to comfortably sit at and eat. Above and below, there are potted green plants and large vases of flowers for everyone to enjoy.
Floor to ceiling windows bring light and nature into the spaces of both floors. If I get a cup of coffee or something to eat at the Café, and I have the time, I like to sit near the huge windows so I can look down at the gardens below. There are cheerful tables and chairs with umbrellas. I also can go out into the garden from downstairs and sit there. Beauty and being outdoors in nature are such a vital part of this entire healing environment.
MSK is truly a temple designed for providing beauty, natural light and organic plants as visual cues of hope and rejuvenation. Sky lights that open above both floors beam light into the areas of the exam rooms. The skylights are about ten feet long and three or four feet deep! The chemo waiting room and adjacent treatment rooms have floor to ceiling glass. While I wait, I can look out and be inspired by large containers filled with bamboo and overflowing with multi-colored pansies. For my first chemo session, my individual treatment room overlooked newly leafing trees. My second session overlooked a replica of the waiting rooms planters. By my third chemo session the flowers were replaced by red dragon begonias. I mention this detail because it demonstrates the care and thoughtfulness that is so much a part of MSK.
For the mind and emotions, there are evidences of kindness and a place of healing in little touches throughout the building. When I open a locker door to change for radiation, there are little signs posted such as: “You are strong,” “You are resilient,” and “The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it.”
Everyone who works at MSK offers kindness in their approach to supporting patients with healing. The receptionists on both floors go out of their way to make people comfortable. For instance: They have gotten me water and coffee. Last week I had time between appointments, and I wanted to do some writing; however, I needed a pen. A receptionist at one of the desks immediately went to find me one that I could keep. One day I was feeling a little shaky. The receptionist behind the desk where I check in wanted me to be sure to let him know if I needed any help. One day my niece who drove me, I call her Susie, needed to have her phone charged. Chris, at the reception desk, used his personal charger and charged her phone for her.
What’s more, all this kindness at MSK is spilling over into my life. Being treated so thoughtfully, reminds me every day to be kinder in my interactions with others. I noticed that the three weeks that I drove myself, I was behaving more kindly to other drivers. Whenever I go to the market, I am quicker to let someone in front of me in line or extend a kindness to another. I notice I am willing to listen to others more attentively without feeling impatient or being judgmental.
Throughout my treatment journey, even outside of MSK, I have been showered with kindness. How grateful and touched I am by the kindnesses that have been extended to me by relatives and friends. The MSK Cancer Care Center is at least a forty-five-minute drive from my house. I was able to drive myself for the first three weeks. However, the expected fatigue from the treatments set in and my brother and sister-in-law, Gary and Andrea, drove me the fourth week. And amazing friends, Marion, Claire, Jackie and Jean, and my niece, Susie, drove me the last two weeks. Several friends have gone out of their way to drive long distances to assist me. It took, Marion, because of traffic, an hour to get to where she met me and then drove us for fifty more minutes. Two friends, Chrissy and Susan, have been regularly emailing me pictures to let me know they are supporting me. Another, Bea, has written me several notes on fun stationary. All the kindnesses I have been experiencing have been so healing. Many people have shared they have been praying for me and sending me various forms of healing. My dance teacher, Dolores, leads others in a choreographed prayer dance for me.
I imagine that many people who initially come through MSK’s doors are in pain, fearful and perhaps discouraged. Some are at a low point in their lives. I don’t know how others feel when they walk into the Center. But, when I see, “Welcome” followed by “Kindness” and then I am greeted with “Sunshine,” my heart feels enlivened. I am almost going to miss going down to Sloan Kettering daily because of the warm and caring connections I have made there. Let me tell you about how the staff made a special experience of my last radiation treatment. In fact, let me show you.
No wonder I am doing so well with all the care, kindness, help and spiritual support I have been receiving.
P.S. As I wrote my first draft, I received a note from my dear friend, Bea, on honeybee stationary. There was a sticker on the back of the envelope that read “Always Bee Kind” and a little bee. I love such a synchronicity!
This is cross-posted from Jane Knox’s blog The Ageless Goddess.
