This Just In!!!
THIS JUST IN from investigative reporter Andy Borowitz:
Cheney Invites Libby on Hunting Trip
Nothing to Do With Perjury Trial, Veep Insists
Vice President Dick Cheney raised eyebrows in Washington today by announcing that he was inviting his former chief of staff, I. Lewis â€œScooterâ€? Libby, to join him on a hunting trip in Texas.
Coming as it did during the first week of Mr. Libbyâ€™s trial for perjury relating to the CIA leak case, the vice presidentâ€™s invitation to hunt for quail seemed certain to arouse suspicions.
But in a press conference at the White House today, Mr. Cheney insisted that the hunting trip had been in the works â€œfor monthsâ€? and had nothing to do with Mr. Libbyâ€™s trial.
â€œI just thought that this would give Scooter a chance to get a little fresh air,â€? Mr. Cheney said. â€œAs far as Iâ€™m concerned, thereâ€™s nothing more relaxing than hunting â€“ especially when you bag something.â€?
Aides to Mr. Libby were less than enthusiastic about Mr. Cheneyâ€™s invitation, however, with one of his lawyers saying that his client â€œshould under no circumstances go anywhere near Cheney, a gun, and the woods.â€?
â€œHe should stay here and stand trial,â€? Mr. Libbyâ€™s lawyer said. â€œWorst case scenario, heâ€™ll have to do some prison time, but at least heâ€™ll be alive.â€?
For his part, Mr. Cheney said that Mr. Libbyâ€™s lawyers were being â€œworry warts,â€? adding that his former aide had his â€œfull support.â€?
â€œIâ€™m behind Scooter,â€? Mr. Cheney said, loading his rifle. â€œRight behind him.â€?
There’s more so read the whole thing. And check out Borowitz’s latest so-silly-it-must-be-real book: