THIS JUST IN from investigative reporter Andy Borowitz:
Bush Fires Senate Judiciary Committee
Critics Question Timing of DecisionIn a move that seems guaranteed to create more controversy for his embattled administration, President George W. Bush today fired the entire Senate Judiciary Committee.
Critics were quick to question the timing of the president’s decision, coming as it did just days before Attorney General Alberto Gonzales’ scheduled appearance before the Senate panel on Thursday.
But in a briefing with the White House press corps today, Mr. Bush insisted that the mass sacking of the Senate Judiciary Committee had “nothing to do with� Mr. Gonzales’ impending appearance.
“I just thought these folks needed to spend more time with their families,� Mr. Bush said. “Especially that bastard Ted Kennedy.�
Immediately after the president announced his decision, members of the Senate Judiciary Committee cried foul, arguing that the President has no constitutional authority to fire members of the U.S. Senate.
But Mr. Bush was quick to shoot back, telling reporters, “The only people who can determine what is constitutional and what is not is the U.S. Supreme Court, and as of today, I have decided to can them, too.�
There’s more so read the whole thing.
You can get and read Andy Borowitz’s other investigative reports here.
Joe Gandelman is a former fulltime journalist who freelanced in India, Spain, Bangladesh and Cypress writing for publications such as the Christian Science Monitor and Newsweek. He also did radio reports from Madrid for NPR’s All Things Considered. He has worked on two U.S. newspapers and quit the news biz in 1990 to go into entertainment. He also has written for The Week and several online publications, did a column for Cagle Cartoons Syndicate and has appeared on CNN.