This Just In!!
THIS JUST IN from investigative reporter Andy Borowitz:
Bush Fires Senate Judiciary Committee
Critics Question Timing of Decision
In a move that seems guaranteed to create more controversy for his embattled administration, President George W. Bush today fired the entire Senate Judiciary Committee.
Critics were quick to question the timing of the presidentâ€™s decision, coming as it did just days before Attorney General Alberto Gonzalesâ€™ scheduled appearance before the Senate panel on Thursday.
But in a briefing with the White House press corps today, Mr. Bush insisted that the mass sacking of the Senate Judiciary Committee had â€œnothing to do withâ€? Mr. Gonzalesâ€™ impending appearance.
â€œI just thought these folks needed to spend more time with their families,â€? Mr. Bush said. â€œEspecially that bastard Ted Kennedy.â€?
Immediately after the president announced his decision, members of the Senate Judiciary Committee cried foul, arguing that the President has no constitutional authority to fire members of the U.S. Senate.
But Mr. Bush was quick to shoot back, telling reporters, â€œThe only people who can determine what is constitutional and what is not is the U.S. Supreme Court, and as of today, I have decided to can them, too.â€?
There’s more so read the whole thing.
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