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Posted by on May 9, 2013 in At TMV, Society | 4 comments

My Delusion or God’s Dream?

Lately I’ve been wrestling with a dream, a God-given dream I cannot shake. Or maybe it’s not a dream, maybe it’s an unrealistic expectation or an overactive imagination. Maybe it’s my dream, not God’s?

No! It’s a God given dream! It must be His dream, the kind of dream that requires faith for outcomes not yet seen, and hope for doors not yet opened. Yes, it must be one of those God-breathed, Spirit-led, miracle confirmed visions that has captured my attention. It’s a God-birthed dream I am wrestling with and contending for. . . Or is it? Maybe it’s just an escape from the realities of living?

Who gave me this dream? Is it the product of fanciful, bi-polarish, mystical thinking? Or. . . did God deposit this dream deep within me, so deep I will never shake it? Please help me answer this question, unless your answer doesn’t sit right. If your answer won’t sit right with me, then please refrain from responding. Unless I really need to hear the truth you are speaking. If you are speaking truth, then please speak up. . . Then again, maybe not. Maybe you can’t understand, or won’t understand or maybe I don’t need you to understand for me to be ok.

So what I’m saying. . . what am I saying? I’m saying I need someone to help me understand this dream. No, I’m saying I need more than understanding, I need direction, I need help, I need others to breathe life into this mysterious compulsion that complicates my daily existence. Or maybe not, maybe I need you to leave me alone with my windmill chasing fantasy. Maybe I need you to allow this foolish pursuit to continue, to allow me to pursue the endless dream without the need to defend or waiver.

Many times I’ve tried to talk myself out of this foolish conviction. I’ve tried to stand from a perspective void of God-breathed dreams. Many times I’ve tried and many times I’ve failed. You see, I just can’t shake the dream. Regardless of all the signs I see and experience on a daily basis, I cannot escape the confidence that God is leading me to a destination I’ve never seen.

Dream Led. . .

Dream woke me up this morning. Dream said, “Better follow me today.”

I said “Why?”

Dream paused and smiled, “You know why Doug. I made you, I formed you, you are hopelessly mine.”

I said to dream, “Are you God?”

Dream grabbed my hand and led me forward, “No Doug, I am not God. . . but I am the breath of God. But you already knew that.”

So dream and I are wandering the earth today, looking to partner with other emanations of the breath of God.

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  • slamfu

    Ever read the “Silver Key” by HP Lovecraft Doug? I may be a died in the wool atheist, but I do have a deep love of the fancies created by our unconscious minds, and wonder at the source of things that drive us to do that which has never been done or conceived of before . Before we landed on the moon, we first had to dream of doing so. To put our little fragile simian bodies in a tin can filled with just enough of home to survive, and cross a vast and hostile gulf with an eye for what exactly? Dreams are beyond both science and religion, half fantasy and implausibility, but not so far removed from the world they don’t profoundly shake it. Dream on my friend.

  • sheknows

    This all sounds like a cross between Paul Davies and Robert Heinlein…. in a good way 🙂

    I see your “dream” as inspiration, a portion of the human brain that is in constant contact with the cosmos. When this portion is activated, we are forced to create.
    It is good to seek out others who also can share, or provide that inspiration or”breath of God”. Just realized….to inspire also means to breathe in.

  • petew


    I can’t say that Christ was literally the son of God, or that he was the product of a virgin birth. what I can say though, is that theological question like this are unimportant, when being touched by reading the words he actually said in the four Gospels of the Bible.

    Atheists are often more hip to the mental tricks and creations of minds who do not completely value objective truth. They who do, also have many definite points. But even though I can’t provide objective validation for the things I believe, I can personally accept them on an intuitive level that is validation enough for me to believe that Christ was not ordinary—if only in the sense that he was light years ahead of, and more spiritually evolved, than any of us could dream of being.

    I am not much for divine missions and faith guided certainties, but I do know that something amazing and unique was transmitted to we ordinary men, in the words of someone who asked his God to, “forgive them father, they know not what they do.”—spoken even as he was being tortured to death on the cross. One thief being crucified nearby, said, something like, “If you are God, why don’t you save us? Why don’t you call on God to take you down from this cross?” But another thief who was also being crucified nearby, rebuked the first by saying something like, “This man is free from sin and is does not deserve to die—but we are here because of our own sins and our own pride.” When Jesus heard this he said, “verily I say this to you, today you will be with me in paradise.”

    To me, this is the essence of forgiveness—that human beings everywhere are reborn when we admit our mistakes and have a change of heart about our own self-importance. I don’t think it matters if the Icon you worship is called Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, or Krishna etc.—they are all simply directing us to love each other and God—all the other discord and folly comes from our insistence that their teachings be embellished with metaphysical concepts and rationalizations of our own making.

    I am going to make an effort not to make my usual extremely long comment, because those who understand my point will already understand enough. Although I accept and revere science, it does not make sense to me, that all the complexity and mysteries in this Universe are only the result of some random toss of the dice on some infinite roulette wheel that many of us seem to accept as its only logical explanation. And what’s more—I admittedly have absolutely no way to prove any of the beliefs I hold on faith!

  • justcowboyway

    “I admittedly have absolutely no way to prove any of the beliefs I hold on faith!”

    Well said Mr Petew

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