Last week, the Netherlands responded to Donald Trump’s ascent to power with a hilarious video introducing itself to Trump as — among other — the country with “the best tax evasion system God ever created” and poking fun at the new U.S. president, using Trump’s speaking style, words and mannerisms, frequently using Trump’s own words.
Not to be left behind, other European nations — six so far — have joined the Trump troll with equally funny, yet hard-hitting parody videos.
What makes the videos even more entertaining is how each country ribs the other countries, in addition to mocking Trump
For example, Switzerland boasts about being “the sexiest country in Europe…with big fat mountains,” in contrast to the Netherlands saying “we’re not flat like the Netherlands.”
And perhaps hitting Trump where it hurts the most, the video declares, “We have the best women. They’re all 10s. . . And we also love to treat our women badly. Love it. We didn’t let them vote until 1971. In some places, even until 1990. We grab them by the civil rights. And they let us do it.”
Denmark brags — rightly so — about its clean, renewable energy while Germany brags about “the best beer God ever created” — in addition to two World Wars, the Wall, Angela Merkel, etc.
Please watch the Danish and German videos below.
Denmark:
Germany:
Focusing on Trump’s xenophobia and wanting to be “second to America,” the Portuguese testimonial admits: “Our founding father and first king fought his own mother—a total bitch—and kicked the Arabs off what was to become our land. Yeah. He totally kicked them off. The Arabs. We know what you’re thinking: our first king would be a great secretary of defense. He’s dead now. Sad!”
Have patience, Portuguese turns to English at 2:05.
Belgium joins the make-us-second-to-the-U.S. movement by recalling Trump’s “hell hole” remarks about beautiful Brussels, but does not let the opportunity go by to lampoon the “Walloons” and the Swedish.
“This is true; Brussels is a huge hell hole…But the rest of Belgium is great. It’s truly great. Believe me. Except for the French-speaking part, of course, because we hate them. They’re like the Mexicans of Belgium.”
“ABBA is the most famous Belgian band in history,” the video continued. “Well, they’re Swedish, but according to alternative facts, they’re Belgian. I swear. Waterloo is in Belgium anyway.”
Vanity Fair summarizes the equally funny attempts by Lithuania to get on the good side of Trump.
Even Lithuania offered an entry into the canon: Internet channel LaisvesTV posted a Laikykites Ten video talking up everything the small nation has to offer, though it admits Lithuania probably doesn’t deserve second place in Trump’s eyes. Still, that doesn’t mean Lithuania doesn’t have anything to pique Trump’s interest:
“We’ve destroyed that nasty Soviet Union. We destroyed it by building a wall—a wall of people. . . It was a real human wall called the Baltic Way. It was the best wall. Enormous. Even Pink Floyd called and said that our wall was the best. It’s true. That doesn’t mean we don’t have walls now. We have Ten Walls. He is the best electronic DJ in the world. Believe us. He is also the best homophobe. You’d love him. Can you imagine? 10 walls? Not one. Not two. But 10.”
Enjoy!
Lead image: Courtesy Slate
The author is a retired U.S. Air Force officer and a writer.