The Alternative Universe of Oliver North
There are few people more despicable and less credible in the American news media than Oliver North.
The right-wing darling of the Iran-Contra Scandal (whose perjury on a matter of national security was a patriotic act while Bubba Clinton’s on sex was cause for impeachment) has been reporting for Fox News from a place that he claims is Iraq.
In Ollie’s Iraq, the sun always shines, attacks on American troops are way down and the progress the U.S. is making to rid the country of meanies is breathtaking.
Why just the other day Ollie was on the blower from Ramadi, where he said that:
“ . . . we went with the Marines of 1-6, First Battalion, Sixth Marines, to look at a civil affairs project. Andrew Colon is a combat correspondent with the civil affairs group that is responsible for winning the hearts and minds of the Iraqi people. It was interesting yesterday, because while we were out there, Iraqi troops — some character who apparently had been trained by the French, perhaps the French Girl Scouts or by one of your friends, Alan — took a pot shot at us. The outcome might have been different if he’d been trained to shoot by Dick Cheney, but he missed.â€?
Pretty funny, eh?
There just one thing that Ollie forgot to mention: A high-ranking Marine officer and two other soldiers who had just escorted North and his Fox crew to Ramadi were killed by a roadside bomb.
Editor & Publisher has the story here, which Fox apparently still has not reported.
15 Responses to “The Alternative Universe of Oliver North”
This is a “centrist” perspective??
Any chance Oliver North can just stay in Iraq?
Oliver North…the ORIGINAL drug kingpin.
Whoever is spoofing Esmay is doing a wonderful job and must be congratulated.
I don’t know, I think that calling out extremists on either side is pretty centrist.
Ok then I call out Esmay LOL.
Am I the only one that caught in his story he said “Iraqi troops” shot at them? Isn’t this like…you know, undermining his whole point about things being OK?
As satirist Mark Russel once said of North: “The only five-star lieutenant colonel in history.”
Well, I guess he earned his perjury conviction! He’s an untrustworthy source of information. Sen Warner actually had to run one of his elections without the support of the RNC because he refused to support Ollie North for Senator, and instead endorsed Chuck Robb. Warner is one of the few Republicans in the Senate that I trust, even if he did keep wait a bit long to speak up about Bush’s policy in Iraq.
So Ollie is admitting that our Vice President shot his lawyer friend on purpose?
Well, it’s not really surprising is it? Obviously our problem is that we aren’t shooting enough lawyers!
Looks centrist to me. The leftist version of North would be someone like Johnny Walker Lindh* — illegal collaboration with rogue Islamists and all that — and I’d certainly call it despicable if he were given a Network slot. The problem is that network heads vary from center-left to the ludicrous right, when measured against what the terms mean in the broader world. ANSWER heads show up on the talk shows much, and that’s probably a good thing.
*even though he, by definition, is a radical conservative, I’ll cede that he was raised in a liberal place. I’m trying to help you guys out.
Johnny Walker Lindh? Lindh was not the enemy until war was declared. He may have been Taliban, more probably just doing his Islamic duty in seeing combat.
Lindh is a VICTIM, North is a CRIMINAL PROPAGANDIST!
Rex 84
Thank you, Shaun, for calling out this… I’ll be nice… Piece of work. Oliver North is the poster child for all that is wrong with “entertainment news.”
The man is in my mind the the single exception that proves the rule “Once a Marine, always a Marine.” I know Marines. Oliver North is no Marine.
Disliking and not believing Ollie North is centrist. Loving him is right-wing. Are we clear?