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David Letterman Apology, Bristol Palin: How To Create A Whore (In Some Minds)

Posted by DR. CLARISSA PINKOLA ESTÉS, Deputy Managing Editor, Columnist in At TMV.
Jun 16th, 2009 | Comments

I thought the time had passed when emotionally vulnerable young women were called out and excoriated by men… for having loved a man– and become pregnant with new life…. and without having first stood before a someone who said words that sealed under the laws of the state, what is called marriage contract.

I haven’t commented on Bristol Palin and her mother Governor Palin, and her father Todd Palin, and the rest of their children, although I did write at TMV about Trig, the older Palin’s most recently born little guy… and here, about some of the challenges to being a woman in political slams.

But I have followed Bristol’s carrying of new life inside her own body, watched the tenderness with which she, still pregnant, carried around and loved on her new brother Trig… saw how her mother instinct appears perfectly risen.

As a mother of grown daughters, as a grandmother, watching all attacks against the Palin children and being helpless to stop the moraine of media attacks… first on Trig when he was brand new born ( oh who’s baby is he really? the gossip hissed about on the net and in MSM), now on young Bristol Palin beginning at age 17 (Oooo, unwed mother, oooo she’s a slut, oooo she dares to ‘parade around’ in public), and now on Willow Palin, 14 years old (worthy of rape by a sport’s figure, with Letterman now saying he meant Bristol, not Willow ought be the butt of his joke about being raped, as Bristol is of legal age—Letterman today said, he checked on Bristol’s legal age before he told the joke”…

All this has sickened my heart, and the heart of many many parents that I know personally, sickened the hearts of any one who loves children and knows it takes a long long time to become an adult… mostly settled by about age 40 or so. The state and federal government’s bars about many things are daft, including that people are old enough to be mature at age whatever. It’s a custom job, in my experience. Some are wiser than their years, others take a long time to coalesce.)

For nearly a year now, we’ve heard the deadly vipers that have risen out of the ground to attack Bristol in particular, whilst she was carrying and after she gave birth to her child as well… most attackers far older than she, old enough to be fathers, and grandfathers… all the more shame on them.

Most attackers, amongst other things, seemingly expecting Bristol, a child grown up in a small village, now having a child very early, even still, to have the experience and act in ways one might find as a fifty year old duff who went to University back in the last century.

The outright assumptions about Bristol’s character, heart and soul, are inhumane and grotesque. It is not true, it has never been true that a girl-woman who ‘opens her legs,’– as some put it– for a man… gets what she deserves. That trope not only degrades the female, it puts forth that males are exploiters without conscience. Saying the little guy has no conscience when hungry, doesn’t wash either. That infers that men are witless.

They’re not. Not even close.

But some, are apparently heartless. And use the young to make their hash marks publicly. Or to whip people up because firing up sexual gossip is exciting to the attackers.

Some like to be seen by others as making hay/ money/ gaining attention by literally hovering over the sexual and life-giving body of a girl they do not even know, have never had a meaningful conversation with. Just pouncing and raising the ‘whore flag’ and sitting back and enjoying ‘the action’ in response. That’s wrong.

It’s not just Letterman; his writers and he are only following an incredibly primitive strain that still lives in our culture like a despicable mutating virus… in part, the thinking goes like this:

a girl, a woman, having cared for a man and who has become pregnant by him, and is not in an adjudicated legal contract with him, and who gives birth to a child, whether or not the relationship has worked out, has somehow become a whore…

a woman who holds no morals, a woman whose heart, mind and body are worthy of being raped by other men, worthy of vulgar assertions on a daily basis, worthy of being spall from cheap gossip, worthy of taunting, mocking…

worthy of being– in the eyes of some men, and the women who support those denigrating views of another human—completely unworthy of being treated with decency, protection, and honor. Instead they move to cut her heart out. She deserves it after all. Look at what she did. Laid down with a man.

For attackers, there is no knowledge whatsoever about how Bristol, a young woman who carried a child under her heart and who is not married, loved this man, how she cared and carried hope in her young spirit, how they had planned their future together, what pressures others put on them positively and negatively, how heartbreaking and frightened and desperate matters became as some hopes broke apart, what scars were laid down by that alone.

No more scar tissue was needed. But the attackers have made life-long lacerations, needlessly slashing at the young Bristol and Levi, both. And these young deserved it because ‘they went on TV.’

What outrage that she/they go on television trying to tell truth about abstinence and other matters that all boy-men and girl-women struggle with so. How dare she/they say, do, be, act– perfectly or imperfectly– any of these.

The young ‘asked for it, they did, see? By going on TV!’

This is, in significant part, the subtext of the attacker’s defense… the most addled defense of all.

Most of us just regular people have serious challenges in our lives with regard to health, finances, aging parents, political encroachments in our back yards, fears for our loved ones. It just cannot be that outrage over a girl-child who the attackers are not even related to, have never met, do not know except for flashes of edited media, ought rouse us all to carry faggots to the burning place in the village square.

Surely there are other matters that rise far higher than joining in humiliating others.

There will be much blathering about today about Letterman’s ‘explaining-apology’ and the Palin family’s acceptance which is gracious-righteous and also drags in the kitchen sink, among other things. I say, let it remain as it is now. Let it be done.

For… Letterman by his original meant-to-be-comedic comment, to his credit in an odd way, let show above ground the longing toward vulgarity that has been sliming and creeping around behind the scenes in our less than conscious layer of culture, regarding Bristol Palin … and more so, far far more so– any girl, any woman who dares to lie with a man… and become pregnant.

His ‘comedic comment’ flensed open that putrid bag of slander: the first erroneous assumption being that a girl or woman in such circumstance will now lay with anyone. The second erroneous assumption is that maybe if you call her out, hound her, harass her, publicly shame her, debase her enough, attack her sense of human selfhood, maybe she who is such a slut, will lay with you too. At least in fantasy. The third assumption, being that since she is such trash, she is worthy of being raped without conscience.

All that is sick. Sicker than sick. Bristol Palin is young. Younger than her years for many reasons, and now, believe me, not because her mother is a governor, but because of who has harmed her, publicly bound her and dragged her out in their own wooden wagon made of sticks, attempting to strip her down and tie her to the post, and every day in the media, every day, light the fire to burn her.

I refuse. A lot of us refuse. Let’s just set a bar. Than Shwe, the butcher of Burma is currently attempting to put Aung San Suu Kyi (Nobel Peace Prize awardee for raising a democracy in corrupt Burma, which Than Shwe overthrew with violence) in prison where with her delicate health she will surely perish…

Compare that to the gossip knitted up daily over a young mother from Alaska… the news of Bristol on any day, is only a coming of age story of a young woman growing up.

Neither woman ought perish, nor be defamed, or hounded, nor accused pettily and unjustly, nor punished, nor humiliated by those who want to lord over. Are Bristol and Aung equals? Yes. They are innocent human beings with hearts and souls. And neither and none ought be held out as piñatas for propaganda’s sake or for public incitement or lathered up arousal.

Neither and none, not woman, not man, not child.

No one.

It is inhumane.

___________________________
CODA
disclosure: when 18 years old, I think I can justly say, I walked in Bristol’s shoes, too. But, also, abandoned and betrayed on all sides instead of loving family remaining near. Some of the worst were the after-midnight phone calls from men and boys (word had gotten round the men’s gossip-trunk lines in the small town I grew up in, population 600… and the men and boy-men, likkered up with courage, I think now, night after night dialed my number while my baby in utero and I were sleeping) name-calling, disparaging with acid words my heart, my very soul, and inviting themselves over to (vulgar word) me since I ‘wanted it so bad.’

I cannot tell you how their words and intents made ashes of what was left of my heart, how I prayed to be protected by someone, anyone. The Palin family has done the opposite of what was considered ‘the only path’ for young pregnant unmarried women back then, the one they ‘deserved’: Shun them, harm them, abandon them, prey upon them.

I keep thinking someday, maybe, I will receive several hand-written notes in the mail, for the men who made the night-calls knew my name back then, even though I did not know who they were as they called anonymously. In my heart’s imagination, the notes would say something like this… ‘I am so sorry to have harmed you. I know I did wrong, for I now have children of my own and I can see how when you cried out into the phone, ‘My child is blessed, stop, go away,’ I now know that is true that your having a child was blessed, not wrong,, that you were in your own difficult time, and I made it far worse, hit you hard just for fun, you who were already down for the count, and I beg your forgiveness on my unknowing mind and heart of long ago.’

Something like that. Something that could mediate a little bit the ache that remains from those late night phone calls, the sniggering of neighbor boys, the scraps of paper pushed into my mailbox in the middle of the night, saying words that no one ought ever say to another, or else feel dehumanized themselves.

No conciliatory notes have arrived yet, but those slashings and beating downs by male strangers remain in my memory, healed as dense scar tissue now… after all these years… 45 years later to be exact.

But, honestly? a little part of me still has a candle lit for maybe a kind note or two to arrive… my tiny shred of a dream … I shelter it, in part, because I know that no man who has torn into an innocent girl or woman who is already in desperate circumstances that way, can look at himself in the mirror and say ‘I am a good person.’

I think reconciliation can in these cases, work both ways. I would be made happy to help pour heart back to what was once heartless. Maybe someday, some one or more of the night-strangers who attacked, would too.

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AustinRoth

Bravo. What a beautifully written, insightful post. It puts to shame all who tried to defend Letterman's comments.

Michael Crispino

No outrage for the exploitation of baseball star Alex Rodriguez? When viewed in the original show, I think the joke was a bigger jab at Alex than it was the Palins. In context the joke implied he was a man who slept around. But I guess it’s still okay to think all men are sluts. Just don’t dare imply a woman is.

Surprised as an anti-sexist advocate you didn't opine on the inherent contradiction of being outraged for the Palin girls and not A-Rod. Actually, I’m not surprised.

Do you laugh at jokes made by girlfriends about how men are only good for two things - fixing things and yelling at? I don't know you, but I can guess you've been guilty of laughing at sexist humor before. Everyone has, which tells me you're not angry at this man for making a joke you didn't laugh at.

The truth is you're not offended by Letterman. You're frustrated by how women are still in many ways not seen as equal. Unfortunately it's manifesting itself in outrage toward a late-night comic.

As a man I know it to be true that a powerful woman is still considered a b*tch and a b*tch still isn't good enough for the White House. Viagra is covered by some insurance, birth control is not. These and other examples are outrageous and deserve your outrage. Letterman does not.

The Late Show, while rarely a standard of class, is a vehicle of social commentary. Letterman has long held a liberal view and I think it's accurate to say he's had the utmost respect for women. While he didn't intend to begin a discussion on our treatment of women - maybe this liberal, social commentator did us a favor by exposing the subject to intense debate.

So maybe men are good for two things - fixing things and yelling at.

D. E.Rodriguez

dr. E:

If I could write those hand-written notes,and redress things, I would.

Please be assured that every principled man who reads your words wishes the same.

Thank you for sharing such most personal feelings

Dorian

MReynolds

Good lord. The one thing we never run out of is phony outrage.

It was a joke. About an 18 year old mother who has thrust herself into the spotlight to act as a public spokesman on what is, to a large degree, a political issue.

No one was oppressed. No one was hurt by Letterman -- in fact the phony outrage magnified the audience for the joke a hundred times over.

Aren't we past the era of phony outrage, of victimization by imaginary oppressors, of humorless denunciations by the eternally aggrieved?

roro80

What a beautiful and poignant post. Thank you, also, for sharing your story. Unfortunately, it doesn't look the world has changed so much in certain aspects.

roro80

MR -- I'm not sure if you just read the headline and decided to throw in your little "it was just a joke" comment, or if you actually read through the post and came up, somehow, with the idea that Dr. E's outrage -- her pain -- is in any way "faux". If more people could muster outrage over the constant, everyday bombardment of madonna/whore imagery, impossible beauty standards, and messaging that success as a woman/girl is tied to how well you can please men -- messages and imagery that hit young women all day, every day, regardless of the fact that they are in direct contradition _to each other_ -- then maybe the rest of us could relax a little.

DaGoat

Beautifully written, Dr Estes.

MKatty

Holy.
Crap.

The guy made a sexist joke about an 18 year old woman getting "knocked up" by a sports star. It was inappropriate, he got called out on it, he apologized.Could we drop all the nonsensical cries of "he apparently thinks its OK to make jokes about raping children!" and the utterly inane hyperbole about what a monster he is?

His ‘comedic comment’ flensed open that putrid bag of slander: the first erroneous assumption being that a girl or woman in such circumstance will now lay with anyone. The second erroneous assumption is that maybe if you call her out, hound her, harass her, publicly shame her, debase her enough, attack her sense of human selfhood, maybe she who is such a slut, will lay with you too. At least in fantasy. The third assumption, being that since she is such trash, she is worthy of being raped without conscience.

This paragraph has got to be the most ridiculous, over-the-top mother-lode of melodramatic pearl clutching bullshit I have seen written about this incident. Screeds like this are the reason many ordinary folks who have never been challenged to examine their cultural privilege (whether racial, cultural, or gender based) roll their eyes and close the subject with a dismissive snort when they are so challenged.

ThurmanHart

I appreciate the personal narrative in this. I appreciate the personal pain.

Here's a truth that we don't like to teach our children: A lot of people are pricks. Nice people can be mean and mean people can be nice (notice how we never talk about the bravery of the Nazi hospital corps?). It's easier to think of people as being one-dimensional.

I've never defended David Letterman's comments. I didn't think they were funny, but, honestly, I've heard much more offensive things no matter which daughter he thought he was talking about. He's a comedian, and comedy is often cruel. No one mistakes David Letterman as speaking for anyone except his own foolishness.

Shall we talk about all the mean things say to little boys when they are growing up? Let's talk about how our hyper-masculinized culture looks at emotions other than anger as a symptom of weakness. Let's talk about how many men stagger through their lives emotionally neutered in the name of making them more manly. How many men are pushed into sexualized relationships because "that's what guys do?"

roro80

ThurmanHart -- Yes, definitely! We should absolutely talk about how the gender crap that's hurled at both kids and adults of both (all?) genders hurts everyone. That's not necessarily the topic of this post, but I would be happy to see a post with that bent.

casualobserver

When the "new names" here express "overblown/unfair" here on a regular basis, I'll reevaluate their dedication to the principle. As it appears only now a darling of the left gets lambasted by public opinion, I'll mark it down as disingenuous.

ordinarysparrow

i can so hear what you are saying here. . .it is easier to understand how teens can make mistakes than how adults can be so forgetful so often about their own lives. . . .

after reading the column, thought of your article a while back in NCR about "he without sin cast let him cast the first stone", because i remembered it was not so long ago David Letterman was bit red faced for finding out his much younger girlfriend was pregnant out of "wedlock". . .

so i decided to check on the web if my memory was accurate. . .this is from Blogcritics. . . shows a bit of the irony and bias of how his love child was viewed and how he viewed another's???. .

"David Letterman and hope for a new day." by Al Barger

"It's been a rough week, people dying all around. Indeed, there are always people dying. Some of my favorite children lost a grandmother last week. This week has just featured a couple of names important to a lot of us. The passing of Warren Zevon was sad. Poor nice John Ritter will probably get lost in the mix, going out the same day as the legendary Johnny Cash.

On the other hand, the human seed is strong and resilient. As us old ones start to wear out, there's a new crop coming up to give us hope and comfort and to eventually take our place.

David Letterman is about to become a father. Within minutes of hearing of the the passing of Johnny Cash, I read about Letterman's announcement. Taping yesterday (9-11-03) for Friday broadcast (9-12-03), 56 year old Letterman announced that his girlfriend is six months pregnant.

Charmingly, he's a little embarrassed to have conceived his child out of wedlock. "I realize we kind of got the cart before the horse here." Not very many people in his high entertainment industry social strata would even recognize such a consideration.

A couple of years ago, Letterman was having critical heart surgery. He narrowly escaped death. Now, even just reading the text of his remarks, he's obviously giddy. Imagine finally becoming a father at 56. He's got renewed hope and joy for the rest of his days.

Let us conclude, then, with the lyrics of Steve Earle's greatest and most beautiful song:

NOTHING BUT A CHILD

Once upon a time in a far off land
Wise men saw a sign and set out aross the sand
Songs of praise to sing, they travelled day and night
Precious gifts to bring, guided by the light
They chased a brand new star, ever towards the west
Across the mountains far, but when it came to rest
They scarce believed their eyes, they'd come so many miles
And the miracle they prized was nothing but a child

Nothing but a child could wash these tears away
Or guide a weary world into the light of day
And nothing but a child could help erase these miles
So once again we all can be children for awhile

Now all around the world, in every little town
Everyday is heard a precious little sound
And every mother kind and every father proud
Looks down in awe to find another chance allowed "

(end of blog entry by Al Barger)

such a strange world we live in Dr. E. . . . as always glad your light is here. . .

Marsh

Ah, Dr E - you're always been the voice of reason and compassion. Beautifully done because it comes from the heart.

Ghostdreams

Hi doc.
I'm in agreement with you 100%.
The original monologue was brutal and then that first "attempt" at apologizing was pathetic.
And I quote, "These are not jokes made about her 14-year-old daughter. I would never, never make jokes about raping or having sex of any description with a 14-year-old girl."
The implication here is, that making rape jokes about a young woman over the age of consent is open season.
If he is trying to be funny, I sure wasn't laughing.
More important than David Letterman, is the massive denial that he did anything wrong.
At this point, for me, this whole incident is less about Letterman, than is it about the public conscience.
I've heard everything from denial to straight up, "who cares," commentaries regarding the issue.
My take on it is this:
Today, in the United States, it is STILL considered socially acceptable to ridicule women, make jokes about raping us, throw cruel and ugly words our way if we, oh horrors, get pregnant without marriage, etc.

As for those who have commented something to the affect, "What about us men?"
Well,in my opinion, Doc E writes ongoing about men and women, every colour, sexual orientation, etc. and the anxiety and pain and hurt that all of us suffer. She writes about it all the time. It's not just women she discusses in her work. As a matter of fact, it has always seemed to me that Doc E goes out of her way to make sure that she is inclusive of women and men (and all people), when discussing these issues.
Have you ever hear/read her work, "The Boy that Married an Eagle? (Myths and stories about male individuation)? I loved it but it was seemed to me that it was obviously written to discuss predominately male issues.
Or did you ever hear heard/read, "Theatre of the Imagination?"
There's a poem she reads that she wrote years ago (How to Silence a Woman Retrieving Her Voice) when 90% of the work published was written only by men, critiqued only by men, most every award went to a man, however, before reading the work Doc expresses that today (long since the writing of the poem) she feels that the poem refers equally to men and women and that it would be appropriate to call it "How to Silence a PERSON Retrieving their voice."
I could give many more examples but I would suggest that if you haven't read or heard her work, that you do so before jumping to accusations of sexism.
It's evident that the Doc wishes for unity, compassion and understanding to be wrought from her work. Not division, separation and hate.

One last comment, women who get pregnant before or without being married deserve badges of courage in our society...not ridicule.
I, too, thought we had progressed further than this ...
That we have people defending Letterman and saying that the Palin's are over reacting?
Wow.
We really need to take a long deep hard look at ourselves as a society (and btw, I cannot STAND Sarah Palin...she just makes me .. ill however.. she has every right .. no ..not right, it's her DUTY to defend her children!)

My two cents worth
Ghost

PS if this has typos etc.. it's cuz I had to write it on the run! Sorry about any boo boos.

Stolios

Wow, the vitriol from some of the respondents to this piece. The vitriol from some to a piece so obviously written from the heart, and so plainly offered with thoughtfulness, care, and an eye on the notion of trying to offer thoughts on how to protect, for lack of a better term, our collective soul.

Sure, some don't want their souls cared for by others. They want to stand on their own. Fair enough, that. But the corrosive commentary here, offered in response to a piece which seeks - at obvious great personal cost to the author - to maturely address a question which is of the moment in today's news (and also as old as the hills), reminds me of the firebug who sets a fire to something of meaning to people and then stands by to watch it burn.

Yes, of course you're all entitled to your opinions; we all agree on that. But certain responses here seem to come from a blind spot created by anger, not from a place which seems ready to engage in open and meaningful debate about the issue.

No, wait, now that I think about it, let me disregard your opening up of your veins to write this important piece, Dr. E., and accept, and indeed propagate, the incensed messages of those who spew their anger outward without apparently considering the tone, or spirit, in which the message to which their response is directed was offered.

So yes, I appreciate this piece, and suspect that most will think it quite beautifully adds a more expansive dialog on the topic, which dialog surely seems to be valuable to so many of us. Valuable even to the firebugs among us, that is.

Best,
Stolios

LionAslan

Who're you quoting 'Katty'? >>>>>>>"...nonsensical cries of "he apparently thinks its OK to make jokes about raping children!" "<<<<<<<. You have a citation for your gratuitous quote? It isn't from the author's article, and it isnt from any of the commenters here.

What kind of cultural privilege you talking about? What kind of privilege do you yourself have that you didnt earn, but somehow seem to amazingly imagine you know so much about everyone else's so-called 'privilege'?

The only "pearl clutching" going on here, is you clutching your own little pearl and wah-ing about something the author never said, such as your reference to "...what a monster he is." Reading comprehension seems to be your real issue.

Derelict

"One awkward moment for Lynne Spears at the Yankee game, during the seventh inning, her daughter, Jamie Lynn, was knocked-up by Alex Rodriguez."

How different the joke sounds now with the insertion of different names, right?

While this comment is not necessarily directed at the writer of this particular article, which I feel brings up a very valid and heartfelt discussion about the treatment of women, there is something I want to mention that has been bothering me about this entire event. I know people just love a good piranha media frenzy to express their indignation towards the "The Fifteen-Minute Public Enemy of the Week", but I have to ask...where were all these people when another seventeen year old got pregnant out of wedlock and was dragged through the proverbial mud with all sorts of name-calling, nasty jokes and comments? I'm not a fan of Jamie Lynn Spears, but I have to wonder how many of these self-righteous people picketing, bashing and demonizing Letterman had no problem regarding Jamie Lynn like the dysfunctional whore of Babylon while right now Bristol is being regarded like a victimized saint.

What Letterman said definitely crossed a line, but plenty of similar jokes were made about Spears and almost no one, including Sarah Palin, stood up to defend her honor and self-esteem as a young woman in this country who made the same mistake that Bristol did. IMO, Bristol stopped being the inaccessible child of a politician when she started making the rounds on talk shows and doing photo spreads in magazines which created somewhat of a celebrity status. Letterman, to his own misjudgment, just treated her like he would any other celebrity who was in the news for making a big mistake in the spotlight. That was wrong, and he acknowledged it. But, I'm sorry...Palin saying that he's a pervert and that his joke was insinuating child rape feels like an obvious ruse to utilize all this media attention to her advantage and play the "outraged mother card" to promote her own political agenda. And it's working - mothers everywhere are empathizing with her furiously - but where the hell were all these mothers with their righteous anger over the mistreatment of Jamie Lynn all those months ago? Why should a politician's daughter be treated any more special than a pregnant teen on a television show or any other pregnant teenager in America? Why is it taking a bad joke about Bristol Palin to garner all this outrage now when the same things happened with Jamie Lynn much earlier?

It is true that women are not sexual objects and should be treated with respect by men, however, that's a very complex problem for longer discussion and only part of the issue here. There is a lot of disrespect coming from everywhere. I thought the Letterman joke was tasteless, but the inconsistency going on with this issue makes me ill. Jamie Lynn Spears was just a young kid who made a mistake in front of the whole world and deserved the same respect that people are having for Bristol right now, but she didn't get it. She got vilified and unapologetically portrayed as a white trash whore by the media and by some of those same sanctimonious people holding signs against Letterman and I just feel that's large amount of hypocrisy.

Ghostdreams

MReynolds,
Are you totally out of touch with the issues faced by young women and girls who have or are, pregnant without a marriage license?
If you think this is a non-issue, than you must be.
Your comment, "No one was oppressed. No one was hurt..."
You are just very wrong on this.
There were many people hurt by Mr. Letterman's comment. I know of several women (just off the top of my hat) who were hurt and angry by his comments about Bristol.
They too had suffered such "slings and arrows" when they had, at one time in their lives, become pregnant while "out of wedlock."
My sister was completely shunned by the whole of our family when she became pregnant without that, all important, marriage license...and even though she did get married before the birth of my niece, it was seen as, "too little, too late."
As a matter of fact, no one would go to my sister's wedding due to the pregnancy....
Well, except me.
I had to fight tooth and nail in order to go and I was the only one in attendance at my 7 month pregnant sisters wedding.
I was the maid of honour, the best man, the ring carrier, the flower girl and the one that made her wedding cake (I was 14, I couldn't cook and it was so pathetic an attempt at baking that I've never attempted to bake anything since LOL).
However, the whole situation was heartbreaking and literally tore the heart of my family apart and
not because my sister had done anything "wrong" but because in that one swift move, my family revealed itself to me (and too my sister and my cousins) for who and what they were.
Heartless, hypocritical and unloving bigots.
My thoughts went something along the lines of, "So much for that love of God their always so keen to tell us about whenever it suits their needs."
This never needed to happen. If, my family, had extended their hearts and their arms in love and acceptance, the family that literally was torn to pieces, could have continued on as all families should...
Families that reach out to their young in love and understanding and are small communities of support for their young.
As was, once my sister had been "shunned" the rest of us (who were younger) realized that the dye was cast and it was a matter of time for any of us, should we show ourselves to be "all too human."
That is to say, we ran for the hills (if not physically, emotionally and mentally).
Four years these bizarre unloving adults in my family did the same to me as they did to my sister.
On my 18th birthday I awoke to find my bags packed and my butt being booted out because I, too, had managed to miss the mark (different reason but same results).

As for your comment, ""Aren't we past the era of phony outrage, of victimization by imaginary oppressors, of humorless denunciations by the eternally aggrieved?"

Phony outrage? Imaginary oppressors?
I'm not a phony. I do not think Dr. E or anyone else I know who are "aggrieved" by what Mr. Letterman said, are phonies.
We are very concerned about the smut and slander he threw all over our media with his bizarre sense of what "funny" is and he did so at the expensive of young women and girls all over our nation (and global village as well) who are faced with situations where the love and support of community is so very much needed.

Young women and girls who are pregnant (without a marriage license) NEED our support, not our ridicule, cruelty and unkindness. Attempting to call what Letterman pulled, "humour," to me, is pathetic.

My two cents worth,
Ghost

MReynolds

Ghost:

My mother was 16 when she had me. I have a young daughter. And I write for teens.

The fact that Ms. Estes writes beautifully is not the point. She's attacking a comedian for telling a joke. She lards that attack up with prose and poetry but the essence of it is that she's attacking a comedian for making a joke.

Comedy is rough. It has to be. That's what makes it funny. If it were politically correct, it wouldn't be funny. And demanding that every joke be vetted through the lens supplied by the most easily-offended among us is an attack on the very concept of humor.

There's a truth which is rarely spoken but I'll do it: lots of people have no sense of humor. Literally none. They may recognize that a joke has been told and may have learned to react appropriately. But nevertheless they have no sense of humor. It's like being color blind. Or lacking taste receptors for sweet or sour. Or being tone deaf.

I strongly suspect that Ms. Estes is one of those people. Judging by what I read in many of the comments, she's not the only one.

Those of us who do have senses of humor are not willing to give them up for the comfort of those who don't. Any more than we should expect art lovers to surrender Cezanne for the comfort of the blind, or refuse chocolate so those without taste buds won't feel bad.

tinydoctor

Clarissa, it seems to me that the primary exploiter of Bristol Palin is Sarah Palin. As soon as the news of Bristol's pregnancy slipped out, Sarah made Bristol and her baby bump part of the travelling circus that was her VP campaign, playing to the sympathies of the poisonously deluded nimrods that make up the rump end of Rub-up-lick-end Party. She brung her to the sideshow and started selling tickets. No excuse but no surprise that the customers are rude. Dave Letterman is an often unfunny comedian with a big audience. From what I have gleaned from the innertubes, both from her demeanor and reported behavior,Gov. Palin appears to me to be a classic sociopath. Sarah Palin would appear on the Letterman Show tomorrow if it suited her whim. She is vile and dangerous. Dave is not.

tinydoctor

In fact, I will eat my favorite hat with curry sauce if Sarah Palin does not appear on the Letterman Show before 2012.

Marsh

. . . we’ve heard the deadly vipers . . .

keelaay

Sarah Palin has played her liberal opponents like a cheap fiddle. This should have been a "who cares" event -- a tasteless joke told by Dave Letterman (I'm shocked, shocked!) responded to with an overdose of insincere grandstanding by Gov Palin (no news there either). But the media hypes it as today's great social debate and Moderate Voice liberals such as Ms Estes eagerly fall in line. As tinydoctor aptly points out, it was Ms Palin who opted to exploit her daughter's pregnancy as a side show exhibit... so none should be surprised at the hoots and hollers of her boorish clientele. Just two weeks ago, Ms. Palin couldn't have gotten her mug on TV unless she paid top dollar for every minute. So she instead throws a insincere hissy fit against an off-color, late night, talk show joke and sure enough, the media takes the bait and puts her back on TV front and center. Just where she wants to be...

The media (including the Moderate Voice) are eager suckers playing into Palin's nothing-to-lose hand. She saw a cheap avenue to get back in the limelight and the media are gullible enough to shine it on her. Sarah Palin played us for patsies, and won.

keelaay

"Clarissa, it seems to me that the primary exploiter of Bristol Palin is Sarah Palin... She brung her to the sideshow and started selling tickets. No excuse but no surprise that the customers are rude."

Well said!

TT

Comedy doesn't have to be rough to be funny - just think of any number of comedians that are funny without being politically correct and without being 'rough' in the sense that jokes Letterman made were 'rough' or 'ugly'.

Not thinking that something like that is 'funny' does not indicate someone is lacking a sense of humour.
Calling something a joke doesn't mean it's funny. For example, jokes about children being sexually abused is not something I would find 'funny'. Perhaps there are some people that would but I would not draw the conclusion that people that find it funny have 'a sense of humour' and I don't.

Regardless of the situations that children are put in by their parents, the children should be protected by our society and that includes speaking out when they are joked about in this sort of way. It's the same when someone tells you a racist 'joke' at a party. It's not 'just a joke' and we should stand up and say so.

KelvinCross

Oh stop it with the pandering to the "poor victim" mentality.... the teenager should of been fully aware of her actions and now has to live with them... Its nobodys fault but her own that A ) She's pregnant B) She's a whore .... Their is a right and a wrong and if you wanna keep up with all your psycho-babble nonsense crap... go right ahead but for those of us with a conscience we can see through your charade. She's made her choices and now has to live with them... dont try to paint her up to be something she so clearly is not..,

LionAslan

well kelvincross, your comment seems written from the grade school playground, along with spelling to match "...Their (sic) is a right and a wrong..." Intelligent discourse starts with actual language. Yours is simplistic name-calling. Yawn.

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