Cartoons: Putin on the Lips
Putin on the Lips
by Clay Jones
I don’t know who ended 2016 in a worse way, Ronda Rousey or Mariah Carey. No, Ronda Rousey definitely had a worst day.
While Mariah Carey suffered an embarrassing lip-syncing disaster at The Rockin’ New Years Eve, or whatever they call that thing, it has probably only damaged her career. She can continue being a diva. Rousey on the other hand literally got beaten down in the first round of a fight that ended her career. She was beaten so badly that even professional wrestling may not be able to convince people she can win a fight. Mariah Carey might be able to beat her up.
The funny thing about Mariah Carey’s incident is that she came out blaming the production company, and that they even sabotaged her. Does that sound like an excuse of a certain politician? Sorry, Mariah that the Dick Clark company couldn’t help you fake it. Trump blamed the production company for one of his terrible debate performances, like it was their fault he’s an international dumbass. But with Trump, he has Vladimir Putin helping him fake it.
In fact, you’d think Putin was writing Trump’s tweets. He’s tweeted praise for Putin, said Putin was right in his criticism of Democrats (you know, Americans), and that Trump knows who’s really behind the hacking and will reveal all to us later this week. Kinda like when he said he’d release his tax returns, or he’d have a press conference detailing how he’d conflicts of interesting with his business, or Melania was gonna have a press conference explaining her immigration status, or that he was going to give us all the incredible details he discovered about Obama’s birth certificate.
I’m not going to hold my breath. I think O.J. will find the real killers before any of that happens.
Personally, the only tune I want to see and hear Trump lip sync to is “sha na na hey hey goodbye.” He can take his little Russian friend with him.