Gary The Goat Acquitted

Gary the Goat

This just in from half way around the globe. Gary the Goat has been cleared of all felony and misdemeanor charges following an August rampage outside a government facility. After months of facing an angry constabulary, the mostly white/gray goat got a reprieve as the judge dropped all charges against the ovine malfeasor. I think goats are ovine, but I’m certain someone will correct me if they are not…it isn’t worth researching.

It seems that Gary, complete with goat beard, horns and all, decided in blatant violation of the law to snack on flowers outside of the Sydney Museum of Modern Art in Australia. Goat and owner, Jim Dezarnaul, were charged by local police with vandalism, in direct contravention of Australian law against consuming flowering plants on government property. Or something like that. Gary the Goat appeared with its owner in court to plead the case. They actually didn’t let the goat into the courtroom, but it would be a better story if they had. Determining that the floral ingestion was more likely negligent than malicious, the judge dismissed all charges. Goat and owner dashed from the courthouse to the waiting three ring circus of the Australian media’s microphones, where a good time was had by all.

And, thereby an Australian national hero is discovered.

  

Author: ELIJAH SWEETE

Contributor, aka tidbits

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3 Comments

  1. I’m sure the owner would have been fined, but what would have happened to poor Gary? Sentenced 4-6 months grazing in the outback?

    Criminal goats have always been big problem. Enough to take the time of Australian courts apparently.

  2. Good… justice served….although i have known one really nasty billy goat…Not at all ovine, he was full Goat…

    Don’t ever butt head with a goat!

  3. Great! Now Gibson, Kidman and Jackman have to contend with a GOAT to keep their hero status. This is what comes of having Summer in January. Down under just gets everything backward.

    As far as ovine, it may be that all the cartoons are wrong, but you are right – it’s not important enough to spend time reserching. Seriously, though, goats are one of the animals included in the charity “The Heifer Project” because :

    Goats can thrive in extreme climates and on poor, dry land by eating grass and leaves. The gift of a dairy goat can supply a family with up to several quarts of nutritious milk a day – a ton of milk a year. Extra milk can be sold or used to make cheese, butter or yogurt. Families learn to use goat manure to fertilize gardens.

    Goats often have two or three kids a year making it easy for Heifer recipients to pass on the gift of a goat to another family in need. This great investment allows our partners to lift themselves out of poverty by starting small dairies that earn money for food, health care and education. Help a family with the gift of a goat.

    http://www.heifer.org/ourwork/our-work

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