Trickle-Up Economics (Guest Voice)
Trickle-Up Economics
Raging Moderate, by Will Durst
It’s all a dance, really. A Democratic president summons the gumption to call for higher taxes on the rich and Republicans cry like third graders having their ice cream taken away and given to the neighbor’s dog. Invoking the hoariest of chestnuts — that oldie but goodie — as predictable as mushy, green grapes in a fruit salad: The Class War Boogie.
For some reason, it’s always a war with these guys. The War on Christmas. Culture Wars. War on Terror. The Crusades. Then they accuse Democrats of being emotionally unequipped for battle. Well, which is it? You can’t have it both ways. Actually, you can. It just makes choosing which one to cruelly abandon to the wolves of winter that much more difficult. Or not.
When taxes are raised on the rich, that’s class warfare, but when subsidies are handed out to giant corporations who siphon jobs offshore so that rich people can have more money, that’s Trickle-Down Economics. What Barack should do is rename his efforts to balance the playing field: “Trickle-Up Economics.” That would, at least, confuse them. Although after watching the last couple of debates, confusion does not seem to be in short supply.
We’re not even allowed to call them rich anymore. They’re “job creators” now. And yes, jobs are being created. In Mexico. And Vietnam. And China. The American Dream is alive and well, just not here. It’s our own damn fault, really. American workers have ruined everything with their irrational demands for safe working conditions and a living wage. Who do we think we are? Stockholders?
Republicans have been as strident as a looped siren in a stainless steel silo in their opposition to a specific Obama proposal called the “Buffett Rule,” which calls for billionaires like Warren Buffett to pay the same tax rate as their secretaries. The GOP prefers the Jimmy Buffett Rule, which postulates that anybody worried about next month’s rent money should start drinking Margaritas until they pass out.
You know what, they’re right. It is a class war. The rich started it and their side is winning. They’ve bombed the middle class into submission burying jobs and pensions, playing chicken at the precipice with default to protect their precious aristocracy from paying one puny penny more in taxes. Cheap. Cheap. Cheap.
Forty percent of all income gains in the last decade have trickled up to the wealthiest 1 percent. The richest 400 families in this country control more money than the bottom 150 million people put together. We’re moving from Depression levels of income inequality into French Revolution territory. Isn’t that Madame Defarge over there in the corner, knitting?
What is it with the rich? How much money do they need? How many cars can one person drive? How many beluga caviar cream cheese canapés can they consume at a single cocktail party? How many silk pajamas with platinum threads can you spill your Dom Perignon White Gold Mimosa on at a time? Okay, three. That’s what Hilda is for. One of the things.
And these are the people complaining about a class war? You want rules, how ’bout the Rolex Tourbillon Rule? Mandating that any job creator wearing a watch worth more than a house who ever mentions class warfare, gets a hose shoved down his throat and goose liver pumped in until pate leaks from their ears. Less war-like. More food-fighty.
The New York Times says Emmy-nominated comedian and writer Will Durst “is quite possibly the best political satirist working in the country today.” Check out the website: willdurst.com to find out more about upcoming stand-up performances or to buy his book, “The All American Sport of Bipartisan Bashing.” Copyright ©2011, Will Durst, distributed by the Cagle Cartoons Inc. syndicate. This column is licensed to run on TMV in full.
5 Responses to “Trickle-Up Economics (Guest Voice)”
Hehe. A bit mean spirited, but funny.
The “job creator” bit is biggest pet peeve of mine with GOP arguments. The issue is, of course, jobs are not being created here, and few are working that issue.
They continually say the tax code needs to be re-written. Yes, it does: it needs to be re-written to provide incentives to keep investments here, in-country.
Other than the tone, the only other thing I’d quibble about is this:
The impetus for the Buffet Rule is basically a myth, or at best just an anecdote:
http://newsbusters.org/blogs/noel-sheppard/2011/09/19/media-myth-debunked-millionaires-dont-pay-less-tax-percentage-agi-low
Make sure you read that chart carefully, at first glance it is a little misleading.
@Barky
Please don’t use Newsbusters charts, they don’t back up your argument.
1) I thought 50% of all taxpayers don’t pay income tax. Where is this statistic?
2) Buffett doesn’t pay much in income taxes. His salary(wages) is only over $100,000. Most of his income is made in investment, taxed at %15%.
I don’t see why not. Can you explain? The data itself is straight from the IRS. Go there, see the data, massage it all you want, it simply doesn’t support the contention that the super-rich pay less % wise than secretaries. That’s verifiable data.
I didn’t mention that in my post. Why did you in reply to me?
This data uses adjusted gross income, which includes wages AND interest AND dividends AND capital gains AND more.
I state, quite clearly and with data to back it up, that the idea behind the Buffet Rule is not accurate as a whole. I’m sure you can find anecdotes to refute, but making broud policy conclusions based on anecdotes is idiotic.
Buffett should know the difference between ordinary income and dividend/capital gain taxation. He is demagoging to make a social economic statement/point. If he wants to equalize the tax rates, he should give his secretary Berkshire stock and bonds and no salary.
The “class warfare” bit is hyperbole, not an argument. The reason for hyperbole is usually related to a desire not to discuss the real issues, such as what WOULD be a good way to approach the tax code.