Believe or not someone got into legal trouble for telling a lawyer joke — and we’re going to test THAT ONE in THIS POST.
So the PC garbage on the left and right — led by people increadily insecure about their political icons, cultural icons, ethnicty, jobs etc — continues in a speech-control jihad that may one day leave this country’s humor as hilarious as jokes told by Ralph "Smiley Face" Nader. The latest:
MEPSTEAD, N.Y. – Did you hear the one about the two guys arrested for telling lawyer jokes?
It happened this week to the founders of a group called Americans for Legal Reform, who were waiting in line to get into a Long Island courthouse.
“How do you tell when a lawyer is lying?� Harvey Kash reportedly asked Carl Lanzisera.
“His lips are moving,� they said in unison.
While some waiting to get into the courthouse giggled, a lawyer farther up the line Monday was not laughing.
He told them to pipe down, and when they did not, the lawyer reported the pair to court personnel, who charged them with disorderly conduct, a misdemeanor.
“They just can’t take it,� Kash said of lawyers in general. “This violates our First Amendment rights.�
Dan Bagnuola, a spokesman for the Nassau County courts, said the men were “being abusive and they were causing a disturbance.� He said he did not have the name of the lawyer who complained.
Americans for Legal Reform monitors the courts and uses confrontational tactics to push for greater access for the public. The pair said that for years they have stood outside courthouses on Long Island and mocked lawyers.
Well, guys, if they tried to clamp down on you, then I guess The Moderate Voice will compensate for it here with a FEW jokes from his joke archive on lawyers:
–What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of two? "Your Honor."
–What is the difference between a lawyer and a Dalmatian? A Dalmatian knows when to stop chasing the ambulance.
–What do lawyers use for birth control? Their personalities.
–Why does the society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?
To prevent clients from being billed twice for what is essentially the same service.
–What do you call 20 lawyers skydiving from an airplane? Skeet.
–Do you know what happens when a lawyer takes Viagra? He gets taller.
–It was so cold last winter, I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.
–Q: Do you know how to save five drowning lawyers? A: No. Reply: Good!
This levels it out a bit. Feel free to use these when your case comes up. The first joke gets a big laugh in court.
Joe Gandelman is a former fulltime journalist who freelanced in India, Spain, Bangladesh and Cypress writing for publications such as the Christian Science Monitor and Newsweek. He also did radio reports from Madrid for NPR’s All Things Considered. He has worked on two U.S. newspapers and quit the news biz in 1990 to go into entertainment. He also has written for The Week and several online publications, did a column for Cagle Cartoons Syndicate and has appeared on CNN.