February 1, 2017
Note to readers: This is the latest entry in Super Baby DonDon’s diary. The series imagines that President Donald Trump has the emotional make-up of a five-year-old and confides his deepest thoughts—such as they are—to Andrew Feinberg, and to readers, every day. In his private moments, he always thinks of himself as Super Baby DonDon.
No, Judge Neil Gorsuch wasn’t in the Klan—as far as I know. But my Daddy probably was. And my Dad and I discriminated against “the blacks” when they tried to rent from us. And now my top adviser is a rip-snortin’, burn-it-down, I-love-Goldman-Sachs white nationalist. So what I’m talking here is continuity.
Now, Judge Gorsuch’s mom Anne was a real endangered species ball-buster. Ronald Reagan made her head of the EPA and she tried her best to destroy the agency. Eventually, she was held in contempt of Congress—hey, I have total contempt for Congress!—and was forced to resign.
So not only is Judge Gorsuch almost as bright as Super Baby DonDon but he has a great pedigree. He knows the outdoors and he knows how to lay waste to the outdoors. He wants to finish the job his momma started. He will help gut the EPA and that is so important.
It all comes down to this: If God didn’t want every acre in the world to be developed, why would he have created so much cement?
Andrew Feinberg is the author of Four Score and Seven (https://www.amazon.com/Four-Score-Seven-Andrew-Feinberg/dp/0692664009), a novel that imagines that Abe Lincoln comes back to life for two weeks during the 2016 campaign and encounters a candidate who, some say, resembles Donald Trump. He also writes an anti-Trump humor page at www.babydondon.com or https://www.facebook.com/MeBabyDonDon.