You won’t read the following headlines in newspapers or online this year. But that doesn’t mean if wouldn’t be a more interesting world if you did:
Cold Fusion Achieved In North Dakota Refrigerator
Congressional Republicans Opt To Focus On Compassion Toward Poor And Needy
Congressional Democrats Put Principle Above Expediency
President Obama Appoints Robert Reich As His New Lead Economic Adviser
Bin Laden’s Conversion To Judaism Surprises Many
Quarterly Financial Reports Somehow Fail To Exceed Analyst Expectations
Guilt-Ridden Top One-Percenters Assign Their Recent Income Tax Savings To Charity
Some New Wealth Created By Economy’s Growth Actually Does Trickle Down
Israelis and Palestinians Both Admit Their Past Policies Were Foolish And Self-Destructive
Anti-Corruption Drive In Afghanistan Succeeds
Indigent Individuals Allowed To Queue Up At Fed’s Lending Window
Global Warming Ceases In Response To Belief Of Many That It Doesn’t Exist
Regulation Finally Understood To Generate Innovation As Well As Costs
Food Prices Plummet, Inflation Checked, As Patriotic Americans Stop Eating
Abstinence Programs Convince Teens Not To Have Sex
Silliness Found To Dramatically Increase Life Spans
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