It’s time for another poem by TMV’s favorite poet, Michael Silverstein, aka Wall Street Poet.
The Gay Marriage Poem
There’s something sacred about the union
Of a married man and wife,
Which is doubtless why such bondings
Rarely lead to household strife;
Were we ever to acknowledge
Other pairings with no cavil,
Then our present social order
Would most certainly unravel.
Everything would then unravel,
There would be wild dissolution;
There is only one solution,
To amend the constitution!
Nothing’s wrong with gay relations
If they’re hidden in a closet,
Then its kind of like a secret
And we needn’t go dislodge it;
But when they get conventional
And want a lawful wedding,
And speak of loving openly,
Where is this country heading?
A loving, open, gay relation
Requires prosecution;
There is only one solution,
To amend the constitution!
I’m not saying that the government
Play at discrimination,
Except in cases where the issue
In-volves fornication,
Or a woman’s ovulation,
Or preferred cohabitation,
Or on other matters sexual
On which I’ve a fixation.
In matters clearly sexual
We need a Fed intrusion;
There is only one solution,
To amend the constitution!
Copyright 2006 Michael Silverstein
Joe Gandelman is a former fulltime journalist who freelanced in India, Spain, Bangladesh and Cypress writing for publications such as the Christian Science Monitor and Newsweek. He also did radio reports from Madrid for NPR’s All Things Considered. He has worked on two U.S. newspapers and quit the news biz in 1990 to go into entertainment. He also has written for The Week and several online publications, did a column for Cagle Cartoons Syndicate and has appeared on CNN.