Are you confused about the differences between this country’s two major parties? Perhaps this simple guide will help.
Republicans have a set of firmly held beliefs. Democrats have things they kind of like if no one objects too much.
Republicans never knew better. Democrats once did but forgot.
Republicans like the economy to be run by Goldman Sachs. Democrats prefer the economy to be run by Citigroup.
Republicans think leadership means a leader actually leads. Democrats think it means a leader is in place to ask the public to help him lead.
Republicans want to screw the middle class and poor in one fell swoop to enrich further the already rich. Democrats prefer to do the same thing but more slowly.
Republicans think promises made to voters, no matter how silly, should be kept. Democrats think promises made to voters, no matter how worthwhile, are something to be fudged or merely forgotten
Republicans think winning an election gives them the right to govern. Democrats think winning gives them the right to start bargaining.
Republicans turn their enemies into victims. Democrats turn to enemies for approval.
Republicans see the road. Democrats see the potholes.
Republicans lose but keep fighting. Democrats win then don’t fight.
Republicans have principles. Democrats once did, too, but gave them up when it hindered their fund raising.
Republicans lose elections by saying what they really want. Democrats win elections by lying about what they’ll really do.
Republicans start wars. Democrats find reasons not to stop fighting them.
Republicans seek energy independence via more drilling. Democrats seek it by playing at being venture capitalists with public money given to their campaign contributors.
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