When they lose it on camera and use words little Eddy shouldn’t hear.

See it on Gawker (but we got the tip from Andrew Sullivan)

This Guest Voice post is by Watching America translator Dorian de Wind, who is also a retired U.S. Air Force officer. Guest Voice posts do not necessarily reflect the viewpoint of TMV and its writers.

From the Frying Pan into the Fire, and Back to the Showers–at Home

by Dorian de Wind

Political scandals–there are so many of them these days-seem to have a very short shelf life, perhaps with the exception of those involving the Rev. Jeremiah Wright. These are kept alive forever on the now-famous “endless loop” by the righteous media.

One of those scandals rapidly fading from most people’s memories is Idaho Senator Larry Craig’s “episode” in that men’s restroom at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport almost a year ago now.

Somehow, that incident and its repercussions must have still been fresh on my mind when I was taking a shower at our fitness center recently.

Let me explain.

As a 68-year-old senior–straight, I should add–I am in dire need of some kind of physical activity to stay fit. So I do various stretching exercises while in the shower at home. One of these exercises involves standing tip-toe and stretching and rotating each arm in a circular motion high above my head.

After joining our local fitness center, I saw no reason for not continuing these exercises at the center while taking a shower after my swimming and steam room routine.

During one of my first exercise sessions there, I happened to glance at the opaque-glass separation between my shower and the adjoining one and saw the silhouette of another shower taker. I froze in mid-exercise when it suddenly dawned on me that my neighbor could surely see my hand and arm waving motions. Remembering the Larry Craig episode and not wanting my waving to be misconstrued, I instantly stopped my exercise and slinked out of the shower and eventually out of the center.

On my way home, I mulled the whole incident over and for an instant–just an instant–I felt a pang of pity for the senator. What if his gestures in that airport restroom had been misconstrued?

Just for an instant, because then I remembered the anti-gay words and anti-gay legislative initiatives by the senator from Idaho, and my compassion for him–gay or not gay–quickly evaporated.

On the way home, I concluded that the showers at the center were not the right place for my exercises.

Missing my exercise routine, however, I decided a few days later that the steam room at the fitness center would be a good place for resuming my stretching exercises–but only when I found myself alone there.

It was all going well until the other morning. That is when two concerned fellow fitness center enthusiasts, who had discerned my strenuous arm-waving through the thick clouds of steam, rushed into the steam room, ready to rescue me and to summon all kinds of medical assistance. After somewhat oafishly explaining that everything was OK, I decided that the steam room was not the right venue for my stretching exercises either.

So, it’s back to the showers for me now–the ones at home.

And it’s back to the other stories for the media—you know, the stories that keep on endlessly looping, and giving endless hope to Republicans.

Dorian de Wind is a retired U.S. Air Force Officer, born in Ecuador and educated in The Netherlands. He has a bachelor’s degree from of Texas A&M University and a master’s degree from the University of Southern Mississippi. Dorian has written opinion pieces and travel and other articles for the Austin American-Statesman and for the military newspaper Stars and Stripes. He also translates Dutch press articles for watchingamerica.com.

There are books about motherless daughters and motherless mothers. I’m the daughter of a motherless mother, but I only came to glimpse even the tiniest look at what it must be like for my mother, and millions of others, a few years ago.

Mother and mothering is a concept that doesn’t restrict itself to women with children, or perhaps even women period. But the need to have a relationship that is like that which we have with a person we call mother - that, I believe, is indispensible.

Nobody Loves Me Better (originally published 5/04)

by Jill Miller Zimon

My mother hates my hair color. She says it’s unprofessional, a color only men like, and if I want to be taken seriously, I’ll retreat to dishwater brown.

I give her compliments too. A few years ago, after she had cosmetic surgery, I told her she looked creepy. Who wouldn’t want me for a daughter?

And yet, this woman does for me what I’d never do for myself. While I finished up graduate school, she planned my wedding. My kids’ Halloween costumes? Made by Grammy. Clothes with missing buttons? Ripped seams and extra long hems? Stuffed in a plastic bag until she visits her only daughter.

I let her commandeer my house when she comes. I don’t buy food for days beforehand because I know she’ll shop and pay for everything. She makes her bed and retrieves towels from unfolded piles of laundry. Then she folds the rest. Not like I fold, mind you, but I let it slide.

Do I feel guilty? Am I abusing the woman who delivered me and survived teaching me how to drive a stick shift? Read the rest of this entry »

The Mistaken Zygote Syndrome
by C.P. Estés

I tell my patients this story I made up, with both levity and gravity, to try to explain one of the great mysteries of this Earth: why some parents and offspring sometimes look at one another and ask themselves, “Who the heck are you? and what planet did you really come from??”

Here’s what I have to say on the matter in my consulting room:

We are born the way we are, and into the odd families we came
through:

1) Just because… (almost no one will believe this).

2) The Self has a plan, and our pea-brains are too tiny to parse it (many
find this a hopeful idea) or

3) Because of the Mistaken Zygote Syndrome
(well…yes, maybe…but what is that?).

Your family thinks you’re an alien.
You have feathers,
they have scales.
Your idea of a good time is the forest,
the wilds,
the inner life,
the outer majesty.
Their idea of a good time is folding towels.

If this is so for you in your family,
then you are a victim of The Mistaken Zygote Syndrome.
Read the rest of this entry »

(10.) She can devote all of her time to enable the residents of Guam to vote in presidential elections.

(9.) When she tries to say Muslim it comes out muslin.

(8.) Jack Abramoff may be available to help her with her golf game.

(7.) Her campaign staffers can get a head start on lining up jobs with the Obama administration.

(6.) She’s run out of nice things to say about Obama.

(5.) Maureen Dowd makes her cry.

(4.) Voters aren’t as stupid as she thought they were.

(3.) Even her black maid has stopped talking to her.

(2.) She’s finally realized that change isn’t just the stuff in the bottom of her purse.

And . . . We’ll leave it to you to fill in the Number One reason why Hillary should quit.

We’ve seen our last First Lady of a certain kind. Genteel, always attempting to be background instead of foreground or middle ground. Laura Bush will likely be the last of a long line of smart women who stayed behind the scenes for the most part, or else led lives ‘out there’, like Eleanor Roosevelt who most of the time seemed as though she wasn’t married to the President, but rather to ideas.

We have seen the signs of the remarkable transition from genteel little lady with little to say, and certainly never anything controversial, to efforts to act as a fuller human being… for instance, First Lady Hillary Clinton. She had an idea and thought to bring it to the fore. But, she was bashed for carrying the notion that she should/could/ would dare to be involved in policy; health care. “You’re not a player, you’re just a figurehead; go put your hoop skirt back on and act right.’

Nancy Reagan was smarmed for ‘advising’ her husband; many thought she had ‘too much power’ over him and should just go back to pouring tea for be-medaled dignitaries. Mrs. Reagan’s bold interruption of Raisa Gorbachev who appeared to be hogging the camera during an interview of the Russian and US First Ladies, prompted Mrs. Reagan to intervene clearly and loudly. “I want to talk now,” said Mrs. Reagan. This breach of ‘ladylike’ protocol was hailed by many as a high-fiver for Nancy.

It used to be, and was vehemently expected by many in the electorate, that First Ladies, whether wives of Presidents or Governors, were supposed to remain like the curtains; be backdrop, to concern themselves only with ’safe, feminine’ interests (feminine as defined by softness and sweetness… forgetting that many women are also inventors, innovators and often, warriors ).

The short list below is not to trivialize, for First Ladies’ attendance on under-served populations and ideals that might never have more than a hoot and holler amongst male politicians, has been critical.
Read the rest of this entry »

Not long ago, several dozen gray wolves were reintroduced into Yellowstone National Park. It was part of an Interior Department effort to keep down excess deer and elk populations, and to restore a natural predator to a habitat where it once roamed freely. In a larger sense, it was also a recognition that the natural” approach to public land management, the way it was done before elaborate human planning became the rule, is still often the best way to get things done.

The question that immediately leaps to mind upon contemplating this natural methodology is whether a similar effort might work well in the park lands of major American cities. More specifically, whether the introduction of gray wolves into Fairmont Park in Philadelphia, the Arnold Arboretum in Boston, Golden Gate Park in an Francisco, or Central Park in New York, might have a salutary effect on the local ecologies of these urban areas.

Opposition to such a scheme, of course, might be considerable—at least initially. One can easily anticipate the objections of neighborhood people: “A threat to children.” “An affront to the homeless.” A danger to community security.” The rhetoric is Read the rest of this entry »

A lesser known song by one of the greatest musical satirists — Tom Lehrer:

You can buy his great work HERE.

After watching the below video from YouTube entitled “Baracky: The Movie”, it’s amazing to see how this campaign season has provided so much fodder for the creator(s) of this type of campaign “commentary”. After watching this video, I’m looking forward to the endless entertainment that will be provided by the Supporter Video Wars on YouTube. Methinks there won’t be one-sided swift boating this election cycle with YouTube around. Is that a good thing??

Hat tip to Electronic Village.

This Guest Voice is by video and web producer Joe Windish, who wrote a well received column earlier this week. He takes another look at the dynamics between politics and cable political and comedy talk shows.

Matthews, Clinton & Colbert: Retributive Jusice In The Modern Mediascape

by Joe Windish

Stephen Colbert ends his Philadelphia run tonight with a guest appearance by Hillary Clinton. There’s nothing saying that appearance will be an interview and it’s too bad, too, after last night’s debate.

The story-line this morning is her relentless pounding of Obama on Rev. Wright and the Weather Underground and the like, as he uses tea and cookies as a means to diffuse such issues rather than attack. He refused even to pile on when given the opportunity with her Bosnia gaffe and (unlike Andrew) I admire him all the more for it.

The bigger debate take away, of course, is her “Yes! Yes! Yes!” belief that Obama could win the presidency.

All of this is the stuff of a great Colbert interview!

A Clinton on the Colbert set the day after a debate that some say could have been scripted for her by a sycophant press caught up in all of the non-issues of the day is all of the license Colbert needs to go for comedy of epic Correspondents Association Dinner proportions.

I’ll be watching closely tonight.

Colbert’s performance has been fine in Philadelphia, still he’s yet to really soar. Maybe it’s the road, or the size of the theater (nine times that of his NY home), but I have to wonder if he wasn’t thrown off his stride that very first night interviewing Philadelphia native Chris Matthews…

STEPHEN COLBERT: Your show’s called Hardball.

CHRIS MATTHEWS: Right.

STEPHEN COLBERT: Well I think I have a harder ball than you and let me tell you why.

CHRIS MATTHEWS: Hah!!!

STEPHEN COLBERT: Because Barack Obama did an hour with you, how hard could your ball be? He won’t come on my show. I clearly swing a harder ball.

CHRIS MATTHEWS: Let me put you another case… you’ve got Hillary Clinton coming on, right?

STEPHEN COLBERT: Uh… [pregnant pause]… There’s a possibility of that Chris… We like to surprise people with certain guests.

Read the rest of this entry »

And not just by candidates.

Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton joins some blue-collar workers for a beer and a shot while campaigning in Indiana.

Today Comedy Central’s Stephen Colbert kicks off his Pennsylvania coverage with a guest: MSNBC’s Chris Matthews. But is this symbolic for Campaign 2008 and journalism’s future? What’s the most effective way to deliver news to people on the Internet and to appeal to younger American voters? Video and web producer Joe Windish. offers this compelling original interview on the decline of traditional news an across-the-generations political information delivery system and the ascent of vehicles such as Comedy Central’s news-based comedy shows:

Stephen Colbert: A Media Maestro Plays Philly

by Joe Windish

The New York Times Sunday Magazine cover story this weekend was The Aria of Chris Matthews. Released to the web last Tuesday, bloggers had been baffled by it all week. Even Mark Leibovich, who wrote the story, noted that “three network officials asked me why I was writing about Matthews and not [Keith] Olbermann.”

The gist of the piece was that Matthews is an anachronism likely to be downsized when his $5 million a year contract is up next year. MSNBC’s now betting on Olbermann and David Gregory. Why the paper of record deemed it necessary to devote 8,000 words to that observation, I’ll never know.

Meanwhile, the whole way these guys are playing the cable news game seems a little passé to me. The big questions today are: how are we going to profitably port news over to the Internet, and how are we going to make it appealing to a younger demographic? Indications are that by either of these measures the leader in the cable news game right now is in not to be found at NBC, CNN, or FOX.

The hands-down champ is Comedy Central, whose Daily Show and Colbert Report have been playing by the fast and loose rules of comedy to beat journalism at the news game as far back as Indecision 2000. Since then Jon Stewart’s won two Peabody Awards for his election coverage, and he was joined just last week by Stephen Colbert when The Colbert Report won a Peabody of its own.

Today Stephen Colbert and his 80 staffers kick off a week of Colbert Report coverage of the Pennsylvania Primary from the Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts on the University of Pennsylvania campus in Philadelphia. As it happens, Chris Matthews, a Philadelphia native, is slated to be Stephen’s first guest.

To put all of this into perspective, I called up Dr. Robert J. Thompson, Professor of Television and Popular Culture and Founding Director of the Center for the Study of Popular Television at Syracuse University.

I first heard Bob speak on Radio Open Source after Colbert’s White House Correspondents’ Dinner speech. I first interviewed him after Colbert’s outstanding program on the WGA strike. We spoke again by phone last week:

JW: You’ve referred to comedy as The Fifth Estate. Can you explain?

BT: I started calling comedy the 5th Estate to keep the 4th Estate of journalism in check several years ago… I think this whole notion of comedy as the Fifth Estate really, in many ways, is more important in these new shows that are actually doing parodies of news shows because it’s the idea that the Fourth Estate is keeping those first three in check. The idea of what’s going on in Colbert and The Daily Show and even some of what Saturday Night Live and shows like that, is that it’s not only dealing with the political issues but it is dealing with the way in which the mainstream news operations are covering the issues.

Let’s take, for example, the classic example of what Jon Stewart did in the lead up to the war, when he was really examining that issue in a way that a lot of reporters were not for fear of being called unpatriotic and all the rest of it. The whole Dixie Chicks phenomenon. I think there Jon Stewart was a lone voice crying in the wilderness that this was the stuff that ought to be covered. And he was really making fun of – with evidence, showed the clip and that kind of thing – of how this was being inadequately covered by the traditional journalist operation. So there, I think, what Jon Stewart was doing was a really important message about the lead up to the war, but about the way it was being inadequately covered.

JW: What’s your take on Colbert’s Peabody?

BT: Certainly the Peabody is another feather in the cap of respectability that Comedy Central’s hour-long block in late night television has been garnering. That Peabody just goes on the mantelpiece right next to the invitation to speak at the Washington Correspondents Association Dinner, and all kinds of other things that have just been being heaped upon these shows. So, the Peabody is another example of how these late night comedy shows that Comedy Central are doing are really being taken very seriously by a whole range of people… Now we should remember that it also says something about the Peabody Awards. The Peabody Awards are one of my favorite of the awards given because they really don’t operate on the traditional criteria of what we think would be good. Let’s remember that Colbert got a Peabody I believe at the same time that Project Runway got a Peabody. Project Runway is not the fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, or eighth estate! However, it’s a really good show and I think it deserved its Peabody as did Colbert, but for different reasons. When you think of when Comedy Central first started, and when you think of a lot of the other shows that are on Comedy Central, and you think of how Colbert does that whole act when he dances across the stage when he’s about to interview someone, it’s really pleasing to think that this is now the Peabody Award winning Stephen Colbert!

JW: Colbert is a really tough interview. There’s not a lot of fluff on his show. He brings on hugely complex topics and seems to help his interviewees make their point. And the arc of the show through a season is almost like a college course, he is educating his audience. I come away blown away sometimes. It seems like to me a very high-brow news show. Bring me back to earth Bob.
Read the rest of this entry »

In remembrance of the lost blog tradition of Kitty Picture Fridays, I offer you this image of some kind of illegal political shakedown. I think this cat works for Senator Obama. I imagine him going across the country, forcing people down and demanding they contribute to Obama’s campaign. And from the look on his face, whoever took that picture is next.

I’m trying to figure out how I read/watch/hear so often now that Rev. Wright was the end of Obama and that white Americans will say they’ll vote for a black(ish) man to a pollster, but won’t really do it. Then how did Obama rake in another $40 million (to Clinton’s $20 million) in March? Is it possible that, despite the media orgy, most Americans got past the Wright thing? Not past so much, because it still angers me when I think of it, but maybe they put it in perspective. With 80% of Americans believing this country is in bad shape, is it possible that 5 sound bites from a preacher isn’t what really matters to voters? And if so many people are only lying about voting for him, why are they giving him their money at a time when most don’t have a lot?

While Clinton is getting mostly big singular donations, Obama (in addition to some big donations) is getting double the money in small increments from actual individual people. More than 400,000 people donated to his campaign in March, including more than 218,000 first-time donors. He has had the highest number of donors contributing $200 or less although the analysts have noticed a jump in the $2,000+ individual contributions last month. These are not only minorities and college kids don’t have two dimes to offer. So who exactly are these cat enforcers shaking down for money?

I guess, considering he made $55 million in February, someone somewhere will be crazy enough to spin this $40 million as a bad sign. However, if you add to this the fact that he completely lost the respect of 1/2 the world’s population by bowling a 2 in PA and the emergence of SmokingAgain-Gate, He Cheats With His Human Foibles: Barack Obama Has Smoked Some More Cigarettes!, I predict he’ll only raise $30 million in April. What a loser.

And wouldn’t it be better if all these millions (for all the candidates) were going towards something better than cheesy ads no one believes anyway?
Obama’s fundraising outpaces Clinton’s - Yahoo! News
ABC News: Clinton Backers Growing Nervous About Prospects
NYDailynews.com: Obama raises $40M to Clinton’s $20M
Obama’s $40 Million Haul (And What It Means) - The Fix
Obama boasts wealth of ‘partners’ - - The Washington Times
Clinton Camp Feels Spent, and Outspent - washingtonpost.com
Political Punch: Obama is Smokin’

Sidd Finch was an incredible rookie baseball player who was training at the New York Mets camp in St. Petersburg, Florida in 1985. As described by legendary writer George Plimpton in Sports Illustrated, Finch (Sidd being short for Siddhartha, the Indian mystic in Hermann Hesse’s book of the same name) could pitch a baseball at 168 mph with pinpoint accuracy. The fastest previous recorded speed for a pitch was 103 mph.

Finch had never played baseball before. He had been raised in an English orphanage before he was adopted by the archaeologist Francis Whyte-Finch who was later killed in an airplane crash in Nepal. Finch briefly attended Harvard before he headed to Tibet where he learned the teachings of the “great poet-saint Lama Milaraspa” and mastered “siddhi, namely the yogic mastery of mind-body.” Through his Tibetan mind-body mastery, Finch had “learned the art of the pitch.”

Finch showed up at the Mets camp in Florida and so impressed their manager that he was invited to attend training camp. When pitching he looked, in the words of the catcher, “like a pretzel gone loony.”

He frequently wore a hiking boot on his right foot while pitching, his other foot being bare. His speed and power were so great that the catcher would only hear a small sound, “a little pft, pft-boom,” before the ball would land in his glove, knocking him two or three feet back. One of the players declared that it was not “humanly possible” to hit Finch’s pitches.

Unfortunately for the Mets, Finch had not yet decided whether to commit himself to a career as a baseball player, or to pursue a career as a French horn player. He told the Mets management that he would let them know his decision on April 1.

Although the story was unbelievable on its face, Sports Illustrated received almost 2,000 letters from readers in this pre-Internet age who wanted to know more.

On April 8, the magazine declared that Finch had held a press conference in which he said that he had lost the accuracy needed to throw his fastball and would therefore not be pursuing a career with the Mets. On April 15 it admitted that the story was a hoax.

In this Guest Post, Bill Steigerwald, columnist at the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, has some advice for Senator Barack Obama on how to win the Pennsylvania primary.

Memo To Barack Obama

By Bill Steigerwald

TO: Barack Obama

FROM: ABH Campaign Consultants Inc.

RE: How to win the Pa. Primary

Welcome again to Pittsburgh, Sen. Obama. Don’t worry about those state polls showing you 16 points behind Hillary Clinton. You’re certain to get 90 percent of the black vote here and in Philadelphia. But to be competitive statewide, we estimate you must capture at least 70 percent of the white, Catholic, union, middle-class, socially conservative Democrat voting bloc that has dominated Southwestern Pennsylvania politics since the New Deal.

That may seem unrealistic to you, particularly with Team Clinton having locked up the support of the state’s Democratic Party hierarchy. But we’re confident we can help you harvest white votes in a part of the country that culturally and sociologically will remind you often of Appalachia, except Western Pennsylvania has major league sports teams, higher taxes and poorer roads.

We believe your multiracial background and athletic skills make you uniquely qualified to exploit Pittsburghers’ unconditional love of sports. Steelerism, as you know, is the region’s dominant sect. It transcends politics and ultimately trumps all issues of race, class, age and gender.

Franco Harris was a good No. 1 draft pick by your campaign staff. So was Jerome Bettis. Recruiting both Hines Ward and Coach Tomlin is an obvious priority. While you are trying to line up that Sunday motorcycle ride with Ben Roethlisberger, continue to hone your “Here we go, Stillers, here we go” chant. In terms of policy ideas, we’re still studying whether you should promise that, if elected president, your first executive act will be to provide emergency federal funding for the Steelers offensive line.
Read the rest of this entry »

Barack Obama bowled a 37 (not a typo) during a weekend presidential campaign stop in Altoona, Pa. “My economic plan is better than my bowling,” he told supporters.

While out riding my trail bike this morning I encountered a Little Green Man who was anxious to quiz an Earthling about the Eliot Spitzer scandal.

Q: Why is this such a big deal?

A: Because people love to see politicians get tripped up, especially other politicians.

Q: On my planet everyone pays for sex.

A: Hmm. Interesting.

Q: So your leaders punish people for paying for sex?

A: Sometimes, although in this instance Spitzer inadvertently led the government to a prostitution ring because of his alleged involvement in some suspicious financial transactions.

Q: Should Spitzer resign as New York state governor?

A: Yes, but not for the reason you might think.

Q: Huh?

A: He ought to resign because he’s an arch hypocrite since he prosecuted several people for operating prostitution rings when he was state attorney general.

Q: With all the problems you Earthlings seem to have, what business is it of anyone’s what Spitzer or anyone else does privately with other consenting adults?

A: You’re on to something there.

Q: So he paid $1,000 to be a superdelegate?

A: No, no, no. He paid $1,000 to have sex with a prostitute. A superdelegate is a Democratic Party bigwig who gets a free ride to the national convention and a free vote.

Q: So Hillary Clinton’s not his friend anymore?

A: No.

Q: But didn’t her husband have sex with . . . ?

A: Let’s skip that, okay?

Q: It’s kind of funny that The New York Times is playing the story so big after it was chided for a story implying that John McCain had sex with a lobbyist.

A: Well, even The Times knows that sex sells, although it should be noted that it’s unusual that the feds should go public with the sex angle since Spitzer has not been charged with doing anything wrong in connection with that.

Q: Republicans seem especially gleeful that Spitzer has been snared.

A: Correct.

Q: Why?

A: Because Republicans by birthright can be hypocritical when it comes to stuff like sex. Why else would Larry Craig still be in the U.S. Senate?

Q: Who’s Larry Craig?

A: You don’t want to know.

The Obama campaign strikes back in the Battle of the Photographs.

Ralph Nader, announcing yet another third-party president run, quotes Karl Marx, who said that “History repeats itself, first as tragedy, then as farce.”