What’s Going On Dept: The 10 Most Popular Baby Names

Hey, what’s going on with this name business for babies?



The new list is out for the most popular names for boys and girls in 2004 and we’re shawked…just shawked…by this list compiled from Social Security card applications:



GIRLS (names in order of popularity):



Emily, Emma, Madison, Olivia, Hannah, Abigail, Isabella, Ashley, Samantha, and Elizabeth.



Whatever happened to names like Gloria or the newly popular name Kayla? Where are names like Zelda, Claudette, Rosetta, Mae, April and June? Where is that lyrical name Muriel? And what about Fanny? I had an Aunt Fanny who was popular in New York. Ask ANY New Yorker and they’ll tell you my Fanny was big there.



BOYS:



Jacob. Michael, Joshua, Matthew, Ethan, Andrew, Daniel, William, Joseph, and Christopher.



Whatever happened to names like Schlomo, Irving, Nunzio, Jack, John, Edgar, Harry, and Oliver? What about the Bibical name Abraham? And that great name Clarence?



What’ll happen is the usual problem: parents will stay up all night thinking about names for their new kid and the ungrateful little so-and-so will go up and hide his REAL name behind an invented or shortened one. Just watch.



–Joel Leslie Gandelman Joe Gandelman