Relationships are funny things…

I was born to and raised by former members of the Black Panther Party. I also grew up around my parents’ friends (other former members). Throughout a childhood filled with love and support, the ideas of militant activism rubbed off on me. You could say I was an honorary member of the now-defunct Black Panthers. I fell in love with them. Their struggle. The strength of seeing those black people carry guns in unity. A Black Militia for social activism. But my parents weren’t starry-eyed militants. They were realists. For every romantic notion, I was fed caution. I was told to judge people not by skin color but by actions. I was told to follow the laws of the land and to protest peacefully. Many times they hammered their caution home with looks that would peel the armor off a tank. In the end, they created an independent thinker. A son that volunteers his time to help others. A son that is more optimistic than pessimistic. But they still wax poetic about their Black Panther and militant days. Some of their friends lay the black nationalism on thick over the BBQ. I call these people my friends also. They’ve helped me with homework (thanks Mr. G for your invaluable Calculus lessons), helped me with relationships, and just plain helped me with life. Even though some of things they say are on a par with Minister Louis Farrakhan and Reverend Jeremiah Wright and make me cringe many times.

Reverend Jeremiah Wright… Senator Barack Obama… Relationship. Mentoring. Friendship. All parts of the human experience. Not easily shaken off. Yet this is what running for the President of the United States is about: shaking off “damaged goods” even if you respect, care about, and/or love those “damaged goods”.

The whole Wright-Obama saga (and thanks to my fellow co-bloggers and commenters for their insightful thoughts on this subject) has made me take a look at my associations and friendships. I realize that those friends of mine who have said and continue to say disparaging, inflammatory, and hateful things about people are still my friends. Their impact on my life has been too great. I can’t just drop them. They mean too much to me. They are an integral part of my life, my wife’s life, my children’s life. Even though some of the words out of their mouths embarrass and sometimes repulse me.

Senator Barack Obama has made his choice. His friendship with Rev. Wright means too much to just cut off. He can’t destroy the man that impacted his life so much. Sure Rev. Wright has left his unofficial role with the Obama Campaign, but Senator Obama will not throw him under the bus. Obama must feel that Rev. Wright has not done enough “dirt” (positives outweigh the negatives) to cancel his friendship with him. I admire that since I feel the same way about some of my friends.

Relationships are funny things. We can be impacted by the strangest of characters. One person’s hero may be another person’s villain. Senator Obama’s emotional soft spot has been exposed for all to see. And in the uncaring, unflinching, and harsh world of American politics, a emotional soft spot is easy leverage; manna from heaven.