How Far Should We Have To Go ?
I suspect many of us have heard the story of the man who is suing White Castle for not having big enough booths.
Now setting aside the obvious jokes about eating at White Castle and being overweight, I think that this is an issue that requires serious examination. Every day we see about people suing for alleged disabilities and requiring special accomodations.
Now of course we should require reasonable efforts on the part of businesses. We don’t want to go back to the days of no wheelchair access where the disabled were second class citizens. But at the same time I think we have to be reasonable about things.
In the case of White Castle they reportedly offered to provide chairs for customers who could not fit into normal booths. That seems a reasonable compromise to me, or at least a step in the right direction.
Just in case you want to brand me as not understanding the issue of weight and/or other disabilities, I am well versed in the topic. A close family member was quite overweight and it was simply something we dealt with. If we went out to eat we sometimes had to wait extra time for a table because he could not fit in a booth. I am sure when he went to the doctor he sometimes had to go through extra stuff due to his weight.
Similarly, I have close friends who are confined to wheelchairs and when we go out to places sometimes we have to wait for a place to sit or are unable to access certain areas. When we go to an amusement park sometimes you can’t get on a certain ride or into an older area of the park. We just deal with that.
In other words in both cases we do/did expect places to make reasonable accommodations for the problems we faced. If they provided no way for us to get into the business or if they were rude about things then we quite properly complained. But if you just were not able to access area B but could access Area A, we tried to be reasonable.
To be sure in the past this was more of a problem when places did little or nothing to provide access and it was quite proper for activists to protest and seek redress. But today it seems like everybody expects everyone else to bend to whatever their needs are no matter how much it costs.
I myself have vision problems and bad coordination. As a result I was the nerdy kid who stunk at sports and now I am the dorky adult who stinks at sports.
Should local intramural leagues be forced to let me play even though I am not very good ? Should I get to stand closer to the basket or be off limits to being tackled so I can do better? If I go to a ring toss game should I get to stand closer than everyone else?
The answer is of course NO. I am not as good at these things and it’s just something I have to accept and something I’ve dealt with my whole life. Obviously this is a minor issue compared to those with real disabilities and they do, of course, deserve some accommodations. But people also have to accept that not everyone gets to do everything.
14 Responses to “How Far Should We Have To Go ?”
“But people also have to accept that not everyone gets to do everything.”
Point well taken, but I have tremendous admiration for those who in spite of their limitations, in spite of their handicaps,in spite of unnecessary regulations and restrictions placed upon them, in spite of the “place assigned to them in life” still try to do everything, to be someone they were told they couldn’t be –to shoot for the moon…
@Dorian
I have a son with cerebral palsy who seems to be on course to do just that (he’s only 10, so I have to acknowledge the possibility of parental swooning there). I think Patrick is pointing out that we don’t have to deliver the moon to them.
I hope he wins the lawsuit.
It may open the door for me to sue my ex-wife for being ugly, but still manage to trick me into marrying her. Besides, White Castle needs to loose money for the betterment of national health.
I couldn’t resist.
The Prof has it right on the nose.
As both a compassionate person and one with friends and family members who need disabiled access, I do strongly support the idea that we should do all we can to give them the same access we all have.
But there are limits. As in the White Castle example, providing a chair seems a reasonable offer.
ProfElwood says:
“@Dorian
I have a son with cerebral palsy who seems to be on course to do just that…”
Prof,
I am sorry to hear about your son but glad he is on course to being all he can.
But I think we need to draw a distinction between delivering them the moon and allowing them to experience life on a reasonable equal footing. I think the dividing line is gray but worth exploring. The fundamental question is how we balance the “public good” with the “individual good.”
Coincidentally I was watching Colbert last night and they did a bit about a bodybuilder who was kicked out of a gym for grunting while lifting weights. Now, I don’t have a problem with a no-grunting policy, but when they interviewed the owner, she had an obvious bias against bodybuilders, even going so far as to call them animals (not sure if she was just playing into the bit though, but if so she was a good actor). Although the show was poking fun at both sides, I actually ended up feeling like the bodybuilder had a legitimate grievance.
Anyway, I’m speaking from the perspective of a parent with a child with a severe peanut allergy as well as a very restricted diet, so I get to explore this gray line of “public good” vs. “individual good” all the time, as well as get a lot of unwelcome input from others on the subject.:)
ProfElwood,
I hope you don’t mind me using this occasion to say the following:
We all too often get so wrapped up in at times very angry and hurtful political or ideological back-and-forths (and I include myself in this “we”)that we lose sight that we are talking to people just like ourselves with sometimes very heavy emotional or financial loads to carry.
Then, once in a while, perhaps in a very inadvertent way we get a glimpse of some of those issues our “opponents” have to deal with, and we feel bad that our discourse has been so coarse.
I, for one, have just learned one lesson.
(BTW, empathy is not pity)
In my opinion, Republican rhetoric on this subject does not distinguish between some fat guy suing for a bigger booth the sit in and some kid with Cerebral Palsy trying to access the public library. In fact they act as if there are no people intelligent enough to make the distinction, so therefore government should not be allowed to regulate for the disabled at all.
With respect Allen I must disagree since I am at least a nominal Republican and my comments clearly distinguished between the two.
Patrick, I missed your first comment, so I apologize for asserting that we have to draw a distinction when you clearly already did. I agree that offering a chair should have been enough.
@Dorian
I may not always agree with your point of view, but I’ve never doubted where your heart is.
Never need to apologize AD, you are a good guy who is a real asset to TMV
@ProfElwood
Thank you so much, but “even this heart” is sometimes in the wrong place.
I have a 12-tear old grandson who means the world to me, so I believe I can begin to understand your situation. Please take good care of your son (I know you do
)
You have missed my point Patrick.